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Thread: Open Relationships/Marriages

  1. #101
    Administrator Chlodovech's Avatar
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    An open relationship: the surest way to destroy your relationship. This has got to be one of the dumbest ideas couples can come up with - it's a huge risk for a happy couple and the first step to breaking up for unhappy ones, it's a signal. I suppose some people can handle it, but it's still immoral and detrimental for the social fabric. I personally know a woman whose parents divorced because her father wanted to see his wife have sex with another guy, his best friend - it was his fantasy. They had sex several times and ultimately it led to divorce. Not surprised.
    "And how can man die better than facing fearful odds, for the ashes of his fathers, and the temples of his Gods?" - Thomas Babington Macaulay

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  3. #102
    Proffessional Hickerbilly SpearBrave's Avatar
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    I personally could not do the open relationship thing, you are in a relationship for reasons and one of those reasons is commitment. I am not opposed to the idea of divorce when a marriage goes bad. People should end the relationship before they go romping around.

    Besides, in this crazy world how would you feel if you or your partner caught an STD and passed it along?
    Life is like a fire hydrant- sometimes you help people put out their fires, but most of the time you just get peed on by every dog in the neighborhood.

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  5. #103
    Senior Member The Aesthete's Avatar
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    Agreed with the two posts above. Why bother with marriage if you want to f@#k other people.
    Our beauty is our power, our strength. We can’t allow them to change us, to lessen us. I will never grant them that satisfaction, and neither should you!

    White Oleander

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  7. #104
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    For some people it's pretty black and white, again the influence of Christianity. But love and marriage for life and with one person only doesn't work for everyone. Some people practice serial mongamy, other cheat and lie about it (very many, if we're going to be honest). There are also people who fall easily in love, people who have deep feelings or who can love more than one person at the same time. I agree with Gejfon, Christian influenced culture will say that's not possible, but the low success rates of monogamous relationships say otherwise.. our feelings can't be always limited to the same person, and if we care about someone else it's not "betrayal". Betrayal is when you lie and hide from your partner, you do something and tell them something else, so calling an open relationship cheating is incorrect. An open relationship is a private agreement between people who don't live by conventional Christian rules.

    For me it has happened similar what has happened with Víđálfr, I fell in love with a woman at the same time I was with a man. But the man was understanding and kind to me and we could talk about it. Women especially are capable of loving more than one person at the same time, just as we are used to sharing our love with more than one offspring. But men also often shared their love life also with more than one wife or concubine.

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  9. #105
    Spirit of the Forest Víđálfr's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sól View Post
    There are also people who fall easily in love, people who have deep feelings or who can love more than one person at the same time.
    That's totally me and I do not hide that!

    I believe it is good to love as many people as possible and without imposing yourself any limits... Anyway, there are different types of love, and maternal love is one of them. Friendship is also a type of love, and the list goes on, so love is not restricted to marriages or to that type of relationships only. However, these can also merge into deeper feelings and types of love... and when in a relationship, you can experience more than one type of love with the same person. At least in my case, in 7 years I had plenty of time to experience many types of love in the same relationship. And observing also the relationships and marriages of other people, I guess the most successful ones actually become very good and deep friendships, too.


    Quote Originally Posted by Sól View Post
    For me it has happened similar what has happened with Víđálfr, I fell in love with a woman at the same time I was with a man. But the man was understanding and kind to me and we could talk about it. Women especially are capable of loving more than one person at the same time, just as we are used to sharing our love with more than one offspring. But men also often shared their love life also with more than one wife or concubine.
    I guess there are some men who have the fantasy of having two wives, or girlfriends, who also love each other... Well, I personally think it would be nicer than jealousy and things like that, especially if there is true and honest love. Then this would be probably named polyamory, which could be another topic.
    However, if I am in love with someone I do not mind if he's already in a relationship, even married, as long as that is also fine with him and with his girlfriend or wife too. Actually what I did many times was telling the girlfriends of the men I fell in love with that I was in love with their men. And I've even got good feedback with that. I personally would not feel well if a man I love would be cheating on his partner to be with me, I'd prefer her to know and to discuss everything honestly. And if we could love each other too, or at least be friends, if not more than that, that would be even better. This is how things would ideally be, in my opinion. But unfortunately some people just cannot understand that. And I do not feel comfortable with such situations... If people would be just more open minded...
    Die Farben duften frisch und grün... Lieblich haucht der Wind um mich.

  10. #106
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    Open relationships are what niggers do. Don't act like them.

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