View Poll Results: Were you smacked as a child?

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  • Yes, heavily and I think it affected me badly.

    14 8.19%
  • Yes, heavily and I think it was for the best.

    10 5.85%
  • Yes and I think it affected me badly.

    17 9.94%
  • Yes and I think it was for the best.

    50 29.24%
  • Yes but it had no effect.

    21 12.28%
  • No or very little - so no effect.

    59 34.50%
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Thread: Were You Smacked as a Child?

  1. #21
    Naturbursche
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    Re: Were you smacked as a child?

    Quote Originally Posted by Patriotpatrik View Post
    Those of you who did get smacked as children, did your parents first try to dicipline you for example by confronting you with a loud voice telling you that you had done something wrong or did they use the spanking directly? Was it used for particularly bad behaviour or for minor things also? If i did something wrong, my dad would get close to my face, look me straight in the eyes with a very mean look on his face and tell me that i had done something wrong and that i wont be doing it again. That worked for me and my sister, but then, we were pretty calm as children.

    First they were loud, and when i was still stubborn (I'm very stubborn by nature) i got a slap or two into my face and it made me angry, but it also made me think and get a clear mind. So i'm glad about it actually.




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  2. #22
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    Re: Were you smacked as a child?

    whenever i misbehaved or refused to do chores/homework my mother would scold me and tell me that i was "being a bad girl"...it usually got so annoying i would do whatever she asked...my father only got involved when i got older and my confrontations with my mother escalated. he'd say that i was acting stupid and we'd always get into a huge argument and get in my face...that always upset me...sometimes i wouldn't talk to him for months afterwards...

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    Re: Were you smacked as a child?

    Yes, and our lives became very bitter as a result. I have not really forgiven my parents, and I made sure that they suffered.

    I can imagine that there are times when parents need to smack their children out of sheer frustration.

    Nevertheless, on numerous occasions I have told my parents that I will do everything possible to make their old age a living hell for them, as pay back for what they did. I know of other people who have felt the same way.

    A close friend felt an enormous sense of relief when his mother died of bowel cancer.

    I do not feel so badly about my folks today, but I have still not fully forgiven them. One day I will have to...

  4. #24
    Keeps your Whites Whiter.
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    Re: Were you smacked as a child?

    Quote Originally Posted by Theudiskaz View Post
    .... I had a friend whose dad used to get out the belt, the old fashioned way.
    Quote Originally Posted by Nausée View Post
    No, I think the old-fashioned way is going out and picking your own switch. At least where I grew up.
    Did anyone else get the wooden spoon or the metal end of the fly-swatter (My Ma's favourite)?


    Quote Originally Posted by Boche View Post
    First they were loud, and when i was still stubborn (I'm very stubborn by nature) i got a slap or two into my face and it made me angry, but it also made me think and get a clear mind.
    I come from a stubborn lot as well (surprise!), and there was a definite "3 strikes and let the 'beatings' begin" programme. I was never smacked in the face, though: there seems to be something about that that is particularly degrading. My parents wanted confident and respectful sons, who did not feel robbed of their self-worth.

    It was amazing what my father was able to do just by looking at us a certain way. He seems to have passed this on to me. - Not to scare us per se; but some odd mixture of dissapointment and telepathic "no sons of MINE..." message.
    "...The moral man is a lower species than the immoral, a weaker species; indeed - he is a type in regard to morality, but not a type in himself; a copy...the measure of his value lies outside him. ... I assess the power of a will by how much resistance, pain, torture it endures and knows how to turn to its advantage; I do not account the evil and painful character of existence a reproach to it, but hope rather that it will one day be more evil and painful than hitherto..." (Nietzsche)

  5. #25
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    Re: Were you smacked as a child?

    I know that I got smacked, mostly on my bottom, but I don't even remember the exact occasions. The only time I can actually think of is that time when I got slapped in the face.

    I had a billiard cue, which was almost twice the size of me at that time, and transformed into a deadly weapon I was on a mission to hunt and kill in our living room, my mother was cooking in the kitchen, so while I was swinging and thrusting the cue I hit our candelabrum and brought it down, I immediately dropped the crime weapon and ran like hell into my parent's bedroom to hide under the bed (intelligent I was ) but with her motherly all-seeing-eye, she walked directly into the room and pulled me from under the bed and slapped me in the face.

    I think it is true that a hit on the face is degrading and that's probably the reason why I still remember it, it must have been the only occasion where it has happened though, all other smacks were justified and certainly not heavy nor harmful, I would consider them as positive, and I never got smacked after I got 14 I think, from that time on my parents used to use reason.

    All in all I had a great time as a child, and think my parents did a really great job
    "Nothing is more disgusting than the majority: because it consists of a few powerful predecessors, of rogues who adapt themselves, of weak who assimilate themselves, and the masses who imitate without knowing at all what they want." (Johann Wolfgang Goethe)

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    Re: Were you smacked as a child?

    I was beaten at times as a child, and not always as an attempt at disciplining me either... yet all in all I think that I'm better off for it now. I guess this qualifies as being heavily smacked.(??) However, seeing one's siblings being beaten is a completely different story. This was more upsetting than anything else. Even now, I put these memories out of my mine because I can't bear them.

    I don't smack my own children due to my own negative childhood experiences and a fear that I will not be able to distinguish the line between "disciplining" and "abusing" very well if I go down that path. At least I know my limits. Otherwise, I think that smacking can be an effective form of discipline for others if managed in a calm, controlled, rational and planned manner... it's just not for me.

  7. #27
    Senior Member Wicked's Avatar
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    Sv: Re: Were you smacked as a child?

    The times I was smacked as a child also filled me with hatred and thoghts of revenge, and at some times I also did something to get back at my parents. I got punished for that too, but then it somewhat felt better. Mabye because I felt enpowered by my revenge?

  8. #28
    Senior Member Esther_Helena's Avatar
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    Yes, badly. Up until age 7 I lived with both parents. Pardon my phrasing, but my dad beat the shit out of me. My welts had welts. I don't remember doing anything to get punished that severly. I do recall that he'd call for me and count, if he got to twenty, I got tweny whacks with a belt.
    After age 7, it was my mom and grandparents. I know I got my butt popped many a time, but then it was just one or a few whacks with the hand. (Save for that time I had a rubberball and paddle toy, yeah...) I think those butt poppings had a good effect. Well they did later on

    Quote Originally Posted by Patriotpatrik View Post
    Those of you who did get smacked as children, did your parents first try to dicipline you for example by confronting you with a loud voice telling you that you had done something wrong or did they use the spanking directly? Was it used for particularly bad behaviour or for minor things also? If i did something wrong, my dad would get close to my face, look me straight in the eyes with a very mean look on his face and tell me that i had done something wrong and that i wont be doing it again. That worked for me and my sister, but then, we were pretty calm as children.
    My dad? Nope, not that I recall. I don't remember it, but I'm told that when I was little, I'm guessing around 4, if I didn't use proper table manners I had to stand at the table. Well, something like it.

    My grandmother was one of those "you know what you did..." types, even when I honestly had no clue. My gran was more into the verbal punishment. That woman could talk you into a corner. I remember gettting slapped in the face once. I remember she said something insulting about one of my friends and I slapped her, so she slapped me back. Yeah, that one, oh I totally desereved that one. My gran, depending on her mood may or may not ground me for a week, plus severe yelling-at (worse than it sounds) for leaving a pencil in the floor. That woman had/has a way of making me go from 5'5 to 3 inches tall in no time flat. I specifically remember getting in trouble for leaving a pencil in the floor, or not doing something the nanosecond she requested it be done.
    Sometimes I wish I could go back and just say "Um... dumbass? I have ADD, you know I have ADD, you're the one who took me off of ritalin. And yet you still wonder why I don't finish anything. Riiiiight." Duuuuuur.


    eta. I just remembered something.
    My grandmother was the master of "walk-by-spanking." She wouldn't pop me right after I did something, but she'd let me know I was going to get one. I quickly learned not to walk by her when one was due.

  9. #29
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    Sv: Were you smacked as a child?

    Esther Helena, how did you feel as a child? Did you feel safe, did you feel happy? Did you feel that your parents and grandparents loved you?

  10. #30
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    Re: Were you smacked as a child?

    Yes, sometimes on misunderstanding on part of my father. It happens. He meant well and he had his faults as I have mine. It took me quite sometime to understand. He is no more but I love him.

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