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Thread: Guy's Rules

  1. #1
    Senior Member Ominous Lord Spoonblade's Avatar
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    Post Guy's Rules

    These are so cute

    Yes, they are all number one haha.


    1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

    1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.

    1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

    1. Crying is blackmail.

    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!

    1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

    1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

    1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

    1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

    1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

    1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways, and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

    1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

    1. Whenever possible, please say whatever you have to say during commercials.

    1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions and neither do we.

    1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

    1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

    1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect
    an answer you don't want to hear.

    1. You have enough clothes.

    1. You have too many shoes.

    1. I am in shape. Round is a shape.

    1. Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep
    on the couch tonight, but did you know men really don't mind that, it's like camping.
    I envision a world where people dawning long white robes and elaborate headdresses run rampant down the streets, waving their arms in the air while screaming "we've gone mad, we've gone mad", like defrocked monks breaking the silence of ages past.

    Spoonblade: Sharper than a knife and twice as deadly.

  2. #2
    Senior Member Gladstone's Avatar
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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    Those are good and there's a lot of truth to them. Hmmm...am a bit curious so I have to ask. How are you at adhering to the Guy's Rules Marla?
    Turman found a copy of The Graduate, and thought highly enough of the story that he made a movie he considered to be 90-percent faithful to the book.

    But Turman and director Mike Nichols made one key adaptation, changing the Braddocks from WASP-y blonde characters into a dark-haired, more ethnic-looking family.

    From NPR's Present at the Creation

    http://www.npr.org/programs/morning/features/patc/graduate/

    http://www.norcalmovies.com/TheGraduate/tg11.jpg

  3. #3
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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    I break every one of them all the time.

  4. #4
    Senior Member Gladstone's Avatar
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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Sigrun Christianson
    I break every one of them all the time.
    I am shocked! Shocked I say!!

    Ehh...who am I kiddin..we expected no different Sig!
    Turman found a copy of The Graduate, and thought highly enough of the story that he made a movie he considered to be 90-percent faithful to the book.

    But Turman and director Mike Nichols made one key adaptation, changing the Braddocks from WASP-y blonde characters into a dark-haired, more ethnic-looking family.

    From NPR's Present at the Creation

    http://www.npr.org/programs/morning/features/patc/graduate/

    http://www.norcalmovies.com/TheGraduate/tg11.jpg

  5. #5
    Senior Member Ominous Lord Spoonblade's Avatar
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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Gladstone
    Those are good and there's a lot of truth to them. Hmmm...am a bit curious so I have to ask. How are you at adhering to the Guy's Rules Marla?
    I'm great at it. I'm pretty easy-going. I don't ask guys if I'm fat (I'm not fat and I dont feel fat lol), I only have two pairs of shoes (one which are pretty worn out haha), I don't want a soap opera guy and I love lingerie, I can't remember the last time I cried, I don't want to talk incessently while a good show or movie is on, I don't get angry or sad by a slight comment, and if I do I can't remember anything someone said that bothers me five minutes later.

    I actually really like this one:

    You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done. Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.
    They just left the rules I break out of the list I guess! haha There was nothing said about having to have things my way all the time, like hogging the remote control or being a stereo Nazi I get really indignant when I don't get to listen to the music I want.

    What would you say is the most essential rule, Mr. Gladstone?
    I envision a world where people dawning long white robes and elaborate headdresses run rampant down the streets, waving their arms in the air while screaming "we've gone mad, we've gone mad", like defrocked monks breaking the silence of ages past.

    Spoonblade: Sharper than a knife and twice as deadly.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Gladstone's Avatar
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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Marla
    I'm great at it. I'm pretty easy-going. I don't ask guys if I'm fat (I'm not fat and I dont feel fat lol), I only have two pairs of shoes (one which are pretty worn out haha), I don't want a soap opera guy and I love lingerie, I can't remember the last time I cried, I don't want to talk incessently while a good show or movie is on, I don't get angry or sad by a slight comment, and if I do I can't remember anything someone said that bothers me five minutes later.
    Wow Marla! You sound like a real man's man's woman!

    They just left the rules I break out of the list I guess! haha There was nothing said about having to have things my way all the time, like hogging the remote control or being a stereo Nazi I get really indignant when I don't get to listen to the music I want.
    Well, no one's perfect.

    What would you say is the most essential rule, Mr. Gladstone?
    It's been a toss up between "working the toilet seat" and "the sport's page".

    Of those listed it's gotta to be the one about "asking for what you want".
    Turman found a copy of The Graduate, and thought highly enough of the story that he made a movie he considered to be 90-percent faithful to the book.

    But Turman and director Mike Nichols made one key adaptation, changing the Braddocks from WASP-y blonde characters into a dark-haired, more ethnic-looking family.

    From NPR's Present at the Creation

    http://www.npr.org/programs/morning/features/patc/graduate/

    http://www.norcalmovies.com/TheGraduate/tg11.jpg

  7. #7
    Member Awar's Avatar
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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    I love women just the way they are . Their brain works just fine, but I think that they are the primary victim of brainwashing media. Therefore, I don't hate women, but I'm cautious and disrespectful of the modern, media-tailored woman.

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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it!
    Even as a woman, I still wish more people would follow this one! People who do this drive me CRAZY!

    To people who do drop "hints:" Some people have better things to do than interpret your social cues all day.

  9. #9
    Member Awar's Avatar
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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    Quote Originally Posted by Adelaide
    Even as a woman, I still wish more people would follow this one! People who do this drive me CRAZY!

    To people who do drop "hints:" Some people have better things to do than interpret your social cues all day.
    Bravo!

  10. #10
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    Post Re: Guy's Rules

    Bah. I ask for what I want and I still don't get it.

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