Results 1 to 4 of 4

Thread: Perform, or else

  1. #1
    Senior Member Verđandi's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2002
    Last Online
    Wednesday, September 12th, 2018 @ 02:42 PM
    Ethnicity
    Germanic
    Country
    Luxembourg Luxembourg
    Location
    Asgĺrd
    Gender
    Age
    35
    Family
    Two sisters
    Occupation
    Wyrd-weaver
    Posts
    1,046
    Thanks Thanks Given 
    0
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    189
    Thanked in
    114 Posts

    Perform, or else

    We all know at least one. The parent who pays his child huge amounts if he performs well at school and who withholds praise and encouragement if the child doesn't meet expectations. Or the parent who promises the child an expensive gift or special privileges if he wins a prize.

    Parents' obsession with their child's performance can be seen in all sectors. A recent article in You Magazine highlights the extremes parents and coaches go to for the sake of school rugby. Some parents are so desperate for their children to be heroes, that they would allow their child to play in spite of serious injury, or inject them with animal hormones or other banned substances.

    "For some parents, pushing their children is about an anxiety regarding their child finding their way in an increasingly competitive world, and not being able to trust the child to find their way with support rather than control. For others it can be about their own failures, and dreams they never realised. These get transferred onto the child so that the child’s success becomes the parent's success - especially if they believe themselves to have failed," says Dr Neil McGibbon, Health24's teen expert.

    More...

  2. #2
    Funding Member
    "Friend of Germanics"
    Skadi Funding Member


    Join Date
    Sep 2003
    Last Online
    Friday, September 5th, 2008 @ 06:36 AM
    Subrace
    Nordid
    Country
    United States United States
    State
    California California
    Gender
    Family
    Married
    Posts
    4,097
    Thanks Thanks Given 
    0
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    17
    Thanked in
    16 Posts

    Re: Perform, or else

    I wish successful students would remind parents and older people what role they have, if any, in encouraging their students in school.

    It seems to me that pushing too hard leads to burnout sooner or later. This is a touchy problem because if you don't push a little sooner, there is no later but you don't want your child or grandchild to burn out at the high school level--if anything at the graduate school level.

    When I was 16, and my parents pushed me, I told them it didn't matter--that I was going to join the Army whether I graduated from high school or not. This really shut my parents up but I had no intension of ever joining the Army. Later I found out that this scared the piss out of my parents.

    So, what is the appropriate level of encouragement?????

  3. #3
    Funding Member
    "Friend of Germanics"
    Skadi Funding Member

    Georgia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Ethnicity
    German
    Ancestry
    Deutschland
    Country
    Confederate States Confederate States
    Gender
    Religion
    Christian
    Posts
    1,019
    Thanks Thanks Given 
    14
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    19
    Thanked in
    13 Posts

    Re: Perform, or else

    My husband and I have always encouraged our children to do the best they can do in all things. Otherwise they are only cheating themselves. And at times, when they fall....well, we are there to pick them up; however, it is always important that they take responsibility for their actions, and they have.
    Georgia
    I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided; and that is the lamp of experience. I know of no way of judging the future but by the past.
    Patrick Henry

  4. #4
    On The Road
    "Friend of Germanics"
    Skadi Funding Member

    Tabitha's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Last Online
    @
    Ethnicity
    Scottish
    Subrace
    North Atlantid & Borreby
    Country
    United States United States
    Gender
    Posts
    634
    Thanks Thanks Given 
    0
    Thanks Thanks Received 
    3
    Thanked in
    3 Posts

    Re: Perform, or else

    My parents were just the opposite. I would have loved to have been encouraged and pushed a bit more, if I ever struggled with a subject my mum always thought that it was obviously to much for me and encouraged me to drop it. I'm sure that she thought she was doing the right thing and sparing me from stress but it took me along while to learn to dig my heels in and not to give up.
    Even today, if I'm struggling with something, she'll say " Oh it's to much for you, don't do it" I spend my time lecturing her on the value of hard work, commitment and determination.

Similar Threads

  1. Germans Perform World's First Double-Arm Transplant
    By ladybright in forum Research & Technology
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: Saturday, August 2nd, 2008, 07:57 PM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •