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Thread: Are "Only Children" Disadvantaged?

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    Question Are "Only Children" Disadvantaged?

    Do you think that "only children" suffer or are at a disadvantage? If so, how many siblings would you say is ideal? (If there is an ideal in your opinion)

    I'm going to say that I LOVE big families and think that kids benefit greatly from having lots of brothers and sisters.... as long as the parents can care for them all well. So maybe my limit on children in a family would be around 12 (depending on finances, mother's ability to cope etc).

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    Re: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    As an only child I can say this is true to a degree. I think only children are not as well socialized or have less tolerance for being around people for a prolonged amount of time. Both of my ex gf's were also only children, the first was an intelligent Bohemian, quite different from most, and my second, who was more like an affair, was an alcoholic, slutty kook. Intelligent and as interesting as all Hell, but nonetheless a kook. The latter's Indian mother was very protective of her, and she (the ex in question) was secretly seeing a 60 year old Viet Nam veteran. Father complex, anyone?

    Only children often have to find things to do apart from other children, hence my interest in mythology, history, paganism, Hinduism etc. I get irritated when I'm around someone for too long, unless they are the most interesting, intelligent, out there person. I usually can't relate too much with the average person, owing to their ignorance of my favorite subjects, and my distaste of pop culture.
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    Re: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    I've known a few "only children", they were spoilted, egoists, had bad habbits, manners and education. I think kids need many siblings their age. 12 brothers and sisters may be something wonderful, on the other hand in such big families, the youngest kids, who can have as much as 10 and more years in age difference with the elder, don't know their older brothers/sisters, and vice versa. At least, that's what happens in traditional families over here. It must be very strange to have siblings you actually don't know much. But well, provided you've siblings your age, I vote for big families.
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    AW: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    One should never disadvantage children. Finally they are our future. If one only disadvantages a child, since one cannot custom be made a child. Children need special attention.

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    AW: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    Only children are pretty much the norm around here - in families which actually have children, that is. Most scientific studies have established that there is no significant behavioral differences between only children and children with siblings. I do not consider being an only child a gruesome fate per se. The gruesome fate is having been born at all.
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    Re: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    There are all sorts of pros and cons to being an only child. In the end, it is that individual child who makes his or her world what it is as it is with every individual.

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    Smile Re: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    Thanks everyone for your opinions.


    I've known a few "only children", they were spoilted, egoists, had bad habbits, manners and education.
    Crikey! That's a bit harsh Weggsie!

    12 brothers and sisters may be something wonderful, on the other hand in such big families, the youngest kids, who can have as much as 10 and more years in age difference with the elder, don't know their older brothers/sisters, and vice versa.
    But why would they need to be close in age to all of their siblings? They'd still have a few that would be close in age. I think its a positive thing for kids to know and be able to get along with people of all different age groups. Its particularly good for the older girls to get used to caring for babies and young children, so when they come to having their own it won't be such a big shock, and they'll already know what's what.



    Children need special attention.
    I think that too much attention can be a bad thing.... its not healthy for kids to live under a virtual micro-scope, having all of their actions/words scrutinised because their parents have too much time and energy to focus on one child iykwim? That's too much pressure. Kids need to know to that they're not the centre of the universe.


    Only children are pretty much the norm around here - in families which actually have children, that is.
    Seriously?? Its the most common number of kids to have in a family? I wonder if Germany is having, (or is going to have soon,) the same sorts of problems as China now with their one child policy in terms of producing "little emporers"?....

    http://jcgi.pathfinder.com/fortune/a...698524,00.html


    I do not consider being an only child a gruesome fate per se.
    I wouldn't have thought it was a gruesome fate!

    The gruesome fate is having been born at all.
    You're just making this too easy for me.... .... I won't bite.

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    Senior Member Phlegethon's Avatar
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    AW: Re: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    You'll get there when the drugs cease to sedate and you suddenly get an OD of reality.
    And all my youth passed by sad-hearted,
    the joy of Spring was never mine;
    Autumn blows through me dread of parting,
    and my heart dreams and longs to die.

    - Nikolaus Lenau (1802-1850)

    Real misanthropes are not found in solitude, but in the world; since it is experience of life, and not philosophy, which produces real hatred of mankind.

    - Giacomo Leopardi (1798-1837)

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    Arrow Re: AW: Re: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    Quote Originally Posted by Phlegethon
    You'll get there when the drugs cease to sedate and you suddenly get an OD of reality.
    I'm not sedated.... I'm just behaving myself. Reality??? You go moping around feeling sorry for yourself all day every day... and you say that I'm out of touch with reality??!! Get a dose of my reality love, then you'll have something to be depressed about.

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    Re: Are "only children" disadvantaged?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bridie
    Crikey! That's a bit harsh Weggsie!
    There may be exceptions to the rule, still.

    But why would they need to be close in age to all of their siblings?
    I meant close to "many" (from an European point of view) of their siblings, that is 2 or 3, to play with and for some other obvious reasons. No need to make children if they are like strangers and in very big families, it happens frequently. When the elder leave the house, the youngest is still eating its mother's breast, so it doesn't help to build good sibling relations.

    They'd still have a few that would be close in age.
    Also, it sometimes happens parents make a break and the new born has no sibling its age, it's no good. It's also a question of "management", in some way.

    I think its a positive thing for kids to know and be able to get along with people of all different age groups. Its particularly good for the older girls to get used to caring for babies and young children, so when they come to having their own it won't be such a big shock, and they'll already know what's what.
    Agreed. I had this in mind, especially the later.

    I think that too much attention can be a bad thing....
    Kids need to know to that they're not the centre of the universe.
    Hence my comments on only children.
    Cum catapultae proscriptae erunt tum soli proscripti catapultas habebunt.

    « -Oh my God, but you're a neo-nazi?!...
    -But why neo? »

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