How Long Should Mothers Stay At Home?

[Sigrun Christianson]

How long should a woman stay home after she has a child? By stay home, I mean not return to or seek a full-time job outside of the home.

Just curious. Women & men are welcome to vote.

[mav0ric]

I am a man and I voted 'School Age' I think that is an appropriate time to return to work i you want or need to.

[Ederico]

I voted school-age as well, as I find it the most appropriate. I intend to work and support my family and hopefully financially when I have a wife (I prefer to say when and not if) and we have children I expect someone to take care of my kids when I am off at work, and I won't be relying on relatives. I want my children to be grown like I was, in close contact with their mother.

[Scáthach]

i chose until school age.i think that if a mother does return to work earlier than that it wont result in any damage to the child but it would still be preferable to be able to stay with your child until he/she is school going age.i think a larger lasting bond would be formed through this

[Thorburn]

The brain of a child develops in several phases, and its primary development is finished at about the age of 5. Then the creation of neurons in the cortex stopped, a child's IQ potential and its other mental talents and gifts are more or less fixed, and can thereafter only be slightly influenced for the better or worse. It is thus important that a child receives optimal attention and mental stimulation during these years (beginning already during the pregnancy phase if possible), and nobody cares as much about her child, understands it as well and is willing to sacrifice as much than its mother.

A too early separation of a child from his mother and parents is also the cause of many psychological problems, the infant may exhibit later in his life (such as feelings of inferiority, insecurity and of not having been loved, egotism, and related issues and syndroms). At least one of the parents should always be in close vicinity, until the child reaches the age of 4 or 5, and can gradually be given more independence. If possible, a mother should thus stay at home, until the child is old enough to attend school.

Ideally, the mother (or some family members) should stay at home, until the children are teenagers, but in this expensive and capitalist world of ours, this is for many families often impossible to arrange. In the former times of extended families, where three or sometimes even four generations lived in the same house, the problem of latchkey children simply didn't exist to this extent. I still believe, though, that lack of attention and care as well as the lack of positive parental role models is an important reason for the alienation in culture and values many young people exhibit today. If parents don't look after their children and don't live a life worth to be imitated, MTV, liberal/Socialist educators and rap icons will fill the gap.

Kind regards,

- Thorburn

[Sigrun Christianson]

Babies reach their most critical bonding & trusting period between ages 3 months and one year. The primary caretaker during that time period is thought to have the most emotional and psychological influence on the baby. This appears to be the time that babies being to recognize and separate faces. Thus, it's certainly in everyone's best interest that the primary caretaker during that period be the person most attached to the baby and concerned with the baby's well being - usually Mom.

American laws allows for up to 12 weeks for Family Leave, which includes maternity leave for pregnant mothers. It's customary for a working mother to work as long as possible, right up to going into labor, so that she can save that 12 weeks for taking care of the baby after birth. At the very time when the baby is first learning to trust and bond is the time when Mom returns to work, leaving the baby to be taken care of someone else. Hopefully, the new caretaker is another family member, like Grandmother, but often it is a minimum wage-paid commercial childcare provider - sometimes unlicensed and working under the table. The going rate for childcare providers in California is $2.14 per hour, per child.

Psychologists say that a child's personality and attitude towards life is basically formed by the time he turns six years old. As Thorburn pointed out, the brain changes at about age five (or six) and IQs recorded at age six are consistent with the IQ scores recorded later in life.

The first six to seven years of a child’s life (including his time in the womb) is critical to his success, adjustment and happiness later in life.

-Sigrun Christianson

[Nordhammer]

I responded with my ideal lifestyle, though economic situations might not permit this with many people.

I think the children should be raised until they graduate highschool. Mental and emotional nurturing is crucial until one is able to live on one's own, IMO.

Certainly the first 3-5 years are the most crucial and the mother should really devote herself, and the father as he's able, to the children. As they are able to get into school, less time is required, but the mother should still be at home when they come home I think. Perhaps she could be self-employed at home making and selling crafts or doing work on the phone or computer. Then as they grow into teenagers, if the family had a business they could all work there together.

[Freya]

Untill the kids go to school, then I think a woman has got the time to work a little!
But I think women should stay at home to take care of the householding, and the kids.
So maybe its old fashioned, but thats how I think it should go!
Men underest the womens job!
I`m a housewife myself and I can tell you its a hard job!
Not JUST cleaning a bit, or cooking a bit, no the whole day we are busy!!

[Jack]

Until school starts - that's what my mother did, and it worked fine for me.

[Borivoj]

My mother went back to work a year after I was born, which probably damaged me in some unconscious way . Personally I think a mother returning to work when the children are young teenager is fine. I think I gained a lot of independance, which is important in children, from not being constantly cared for and looked after in my young ages.