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Thread: Internet Dating/Long Distance/Online Relationships

  1. #151
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    The Tinder Effect: Psychology Of Dating In The Technosexual Era

    The prevalence of dating apps is helping make dating more efficient, but this doesn't necessarily lead to long-term relationship success

    If you are a romantic, you are probably not on Tinder, the latest big addition to the online dating world. Tinder is the aptly named heterosexual version of Grindr, an older hook-up app that identifies available gay, bisexual, or "curious" partners in the vicinity.

    It is also the modern blend of hot-or-not, in that users are required to judge pictures from fellow Tinderers by simply swiping right if they like them or left if they don't, and 1980s telephone bars, in that phone flirting precedes face-to-face interaction.

    Thus Tinder is hardly original, yet it has taken the mobile dating market by storm: despite launching only last year, an estimated 450 million profiles are rated every day and membership is growing by 15% each week. More importantly, and in stark contrast with the overwhelmingly negative media reception, Tinder has managed to overcome the two big hurdles to online dating. First, Tinder is cool, at least to its users.

    Indeed, whereas it is still somewhat embarrassing to confess to using EHarmony or Match.com, Tinderers are proud to demo the app at a dinner party, perhaps because the alternative logging off and talking to others guests is less appealing.

    Second, through eliminating time lags and distance, Tinder bridges the gap between digital and physical dating, enabling users to experience instant gratification and making Tinder almost as addictive as Facebook (the average user is on it 11-minutes per day).

    But the bigger lessons from the Tinder effect are psychological. Let me offer a few here:

    Hook-up apps are more arousing than actual hook-ups:

    In our technosexual era, the process of dating has not only been gamified, but also sexualised, by technology. Mobile dating is much more than a means to an end, it is an end in itself. With Tinder, the pretext is to hook-up, but the real pleasure is derived from the Tindering process. Tinder is just the latest example for the sexualisation of urban gadgets: it is nomophobia, Facebook-porn and Candy Crush Saga all in one.

    Digital eligibility exceeds physical eligibility:

    Although Tinder has gained trustworthiness vis--vis traditional dating sites by importing users' pictures and basic background info from Facebook, that hardly makes Tinder profiles realistic. What it does, however, is to increase average levels of attractiveness compared to the real world. Given that most people spend a great deal of time curating their Facebook profiles uploading selfies from Instagram and reporting well calculated and sophisticated food, music, and film interest one is left wondering how on earth Tinder users are single in the first place but only until you meet them.

    Evolutionary and social needs:

    Like any successful internet service, Tinder enables people to fulfil some basic evolutionary and social needs. This is an important point: we tend to overestimate the impact of technology on human behaviour; more often than not, it is human behaviour that drives technological changes and explains their success or failures. Just like Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn, Tinder enables people to get along, albeit in a somewhat infantile, sexual and superficial way. It also enables us to get ahead, nourishing our competitive instincts by testing and maximising our dating potential. And lastly, Tinder enables users to satisfy their intellectual curiosity: finding out not only about other people's interests and personality, but what they think of ours'.

    Tinder does emulate the real dating world:

    As much as critics (who are beginning to resemble puritans or conservatives) don't want to hear it, Tinder is an extension of mainstream real-world dating habits, especially compared to traditional online dating sites. This has been an important lesson for data enthusiasts who have tried to sterilise the game of love by injecting rigorous decision-making and psychometric algorithms into the process. Well, it turns out that people are a lot more superficial than psychologists thought. They would rather judge 50 pictures in two minutes than spend 50 minutes assessing one potential partner.

    This reminds me of a TV show we created a couple of years ago; we profiled over 3,000 singletons using state-of-the-art psychological tests and created 500 couples based on psychological compatibility but ignored looks and race. When the couples finally met even though they trusted the science of the matching process they were 90% focused on looks and only decided to date a second time if they were deemed equally attractive or worthy of each other's looks.

    So, just like the social dynamics at a bar, Tindering comprises a series of simple and intuitive steps: you first assess the picture, then you gauge interest and only then you decide to start a (rudimentary) conversation. Clearly, psychologists have a lot of work to do before they can convince daters that their algorithms are more effective.

    Romanticism is dead, except in retail: This is not a cynical statement. Let's face it, if it weren't for Valentine's Day and the engagement industry, we would have officially moved beyond romanticism by now. The realities of the dating world could not be more different. People are time-deprived, careers have priority over relationships, not least because they are often a prerequisite to them, and the idea of a unique perfect match or soul-mate is a statistical impossibility.

    Yes, some people still embrace a certain degree of serendipity, but the abundance of tools admittedly, most still under construction to reduce the huge gap between demand and supply is bound to make the dating market more efficient and rational, even if it doesn't translate into long-term relationship success.
    https://www.theguardian.com/media-ne...y-technosexual

  2. #152
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gefjon View Post
    Ever been in a long distance relationship, including online relationship?

    Are they real relationships?

    Can they realistically last?

    Do you think it's possible to love someone you haven't met in person yet? What about if you hear their voice on the phone or see them on webcam?

    If you fell in love with someone online and met them in person and decided it's "true love", but they lived very far away, would you move to their country?

    If your spouse had to move to another country very far away, would you follow them?

    If your spouse had to go to prison for some years, would you wait for them? What about if they got life, would you remain by their side?

    Should long distance/online relationships follow the same rules as other relationships? i.e. no dating/sex with other people?
    Am very happy at the fulfillment, having been able to read my lady from the start.

    Yes, if one actually commits.

    Does 21+ years count, with the first 3 mostly tele?

    We met on teen message boards in the 1990s at 16, writing about Paganism and Wicca, which turned into email and telephone, paper mail and webcam, followed by IRL flights and dating on summer vacation, bandcamp and prom, until married life away from everybody.

    I moved away from my junior high school girlfriend and severed ties with her when she only lived one county away from me, but somehow worked up the nerve to pursue my wife once we met in sophomore year and with three states in between.

    Actually, my wife relocated across the country and I followed her to have a woman and adventure--no other clear goals in mind, so it was like a very long honeymoon of about a decade before we moved back to near family.

    Well, since I am already married, I find myself bound to her through thick and thin, but if I never took her maidenhead, there would be no reason to wait out a prison sentence.

    It's not a real relationship if you aren't faithful in the absence of your purported long-distance lover, no different whether in person, because this means devotion between trustworthy individuals worthwhile bothering for. If it were just a pen pal, that's an entirely different story than pledging a future together.

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  4. #153
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    People Are Being Forced Into Long-distance Relationships By Coronavirus Isolation

    Almost a month ago, I waved my boyfriend Stephen off with no idea when I would see him again. We’ve been together over two years and at that point, the longest we’d gone without seeing eachother was 10 days. Now we’ve been forced into a long-distance relationship by coronavirus. I have underlying health conditions and as a key worker, Stephen is still going into work, and although he is following all the social distancing precautions, it feels like too much of a risk. With the situation in London worsening, I decided to leave over three weeks ago to stay with my parents in Northern Ireland so even seeing him through a window isn’t possible now.

    Being plunged into this has been hard. We obviously can still talk every day and video call but it’s not quite the same. But many other couples are in exactly the same boat. Although some decided to move in together so they could isolate, for others that wasn’t an option. When lockdown came into force, official advice was basically for couples to commit to isolation together or deal with being apart. Samantha Smith, 27, and Michael Laud, 28, have been together for seven years. They don’t live together and decided not to isolate together to protect eachother and their families. They’re both still in Swadlincote, Derbyshire, just a few miles from eachother but they don’t know when they’ll be able to be together again. Samantha tells Metro.co.uk: ‘His dad has underlying health conditions and needs to be there if anything goes wrong. ‘We’re both severe asthmatics and I had been suffering from a bad chest infection for the last four weeks (I came off steroids last Wednesday) so I was already suffering quite badly and didn’t want to risk making him ill and then passing it onto his dad. ‘ They’ve been using video call apps like Houseparty to stay in touch and sending eachother voicenotes to keep a connection. She adds: ‘We’re using voicenotes a lot and making sure we have one a day to wake up to. It’s quite nice really. He doesn’t use social media so he has no idea what’s going on on there.

    ‘The phone calls are tough. There’s not much to talk about because we’re both on furlough so it’s the same thing everyday and there’s not much happening. ‘However, I do feel it is strangely making us closer because we’re conscious of the fact we can’t see one another. We’re both putting the same amount of communication in so it’s not one-sided, which is nice.’ It’s also given them time to reminisce about their relationship when they first started dating. Samantha adds: ‘The other day we were flicking through old messages from when we first got together and were talking about our first date and how we plan to redo that when this is all over. ‘I think it’s a good way of getting to know one another again because you’re facing the same difficulty.’ Katherine Hackett, 27, lives on the Wirral, while her boyfriend Elliot, 24, lives in Warrington but as he works as a chemical engineer he is classed as a key worker and is going out every day.

    Katherine admits that the uncertainty of the situation has been testing for their relationship. She says: ‘We’ve been FaceTiming and calling most days which is nice. To be honest, we weren’t callers much before this! We just used to text but being separated has made us ensure we make time for each other over the phone every day. ‘It is affecting my mood towards him. I feel like it’s very testing on our relationship, it’s nothing he’s done, I’ve just been very frustrated with the whole situation and seem to keep taking it out on him. ‘It’s the fact that nothing can be done about it and not having a definite date to count down to when we’re going to see each other again. ‘He’s a lot more logical about things and tries to reassure me but I on the other hand am just so moody! Luckily he’s the most patient and understanding person ever.’
    Read more: https://metro.co.uk/2020/04/08/meet-...3/?ito=cbshare

  5. #154
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    Funny how normies/the oversocialized have to spend two weeks on their own because of the virus and it's the end of the world.They're losing it. Extroverts have it harder these days. Hopefully it makes them rethink life & politics a bit, but I guess most will become even more dependable on officialdom.

    Meanwhile, it's business as usual for introverts and people who have been in LDRs for years.
    [28-08, 00:40] Huginn ok Muninn: if only sigurd were here

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    Meeting the "Perfect" One

    If someone met on-line and proceed to talk on the phone and meet up eventually, it seems to be another avenue to establish a relationship. I've talked to women who met their spouse to be through letters in the old days. They eventually got married after months of corresponding over long distance. One time, I though about writing a few men from the Faeroe Islands or Norway who looked for match since Germanic men are very hard to find in my area, especially my age group. I found a guy who is Danish/Austrian descent eventually at a pub. Where else, lol? I got a Dane last name now, and no one knows how to say it or spell it. But, he can be stubborn -worse than me.

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    Tinder and the Dawn of the Dating Apocalypse



    As romance gets swiped from the screen, some twentysomethings arent liking what they see.

    Its a balmy night in Manhattans financial district, and at a sports bar called Stout, everyone is Tindering. The tables are filled with young women and men whove been chasing money and deals on Wall Street all day, and now theyre out looking for hookups. Everyone is drinking, peering into their screens and swiping on the faces of strangers they may have sex with later that evening. Or not. Ew, this guy has Dad bod, a young woman says of a potential match, swiping left. Her friends smirk, not looking up.

    Tinder sucks, they say. But they dont stop swiping.

    At a booth in the back, three handsome twentysomething guys in button-downs are having beers. They are Dan, Alex, and Marty, budding investment bankers at the same financial firm, which recruited Alex and Marty straight from an Ivy League campus. (Names and some identifying details have been changed for this story.) When asked if theyve been arranging dates on the apps theyve been swiping at, all say not one date, but two or three: You cant be stuck in one lane Theres always something better. If you had a reservation somewhere and then a table at Per Se opened up, youd want to go there, Alex offers.

    Guys view everything as a competition, he elaborates with his deep, reassuring voice. Whos slept with the best, hottest girls? With these dating apps, he says, youre always sort of prowling. You could talk to two or three girls at a bar and pick the best one, or you can swipe a couple hundred people a daythe sample size is so much larger. Its setting up two or three Tinder dates a week and, chances are, sleeping with all of them, so you could rack up 100 girls youve slept with in a year.

    He says that he himself has slept with five different women he met on TinderTinderellas, the guys call themin the last eight days. Dan and Marty, also Alexs roommates in a shiny high-rise apartment building near Wall Street, can vouch for that. In fact, they can remember whom Alex has slept with in the past week more readily than he can.

    Brittany, Morgan, Amber, Marty says, counting on his fingers. Oh, and the RussianUkrainian?

    Ukrainian, Alex confirms. She works at He says the name of a high-end art auction house. Asked what these women are like, he shrugs. I could offer a rsum, but thats about it Works at J. Crew; senior at Parsons; junior at Pace; works in finance

    We dont know what the girls are like, Marty says.

    And they dont know us, says Alex.

    And yet a lack of an intimate knowledge of his potential sex partners never presents him with an obstacle to physical intimacy, Alex says. Alex, his friends agree, is a Tinder King, a young man of such deft text gameThats the ability to actually convince someone to do something over text, Marty explainsthat he is able to entice young women into his bed on the basis of a few text exchanges, while letting them know up front he is not interested in having a relationship.

    How does he do it?, Marty asks, blinking. This guys got a talent.

    But Marty, who prefers Hinge to Tinder (Hinge is my thing), is no slouch at racking up girls. He says hes slept with 30 to 40 women in the last year: I sort of play that I could be a boyfriend kind of guy, in order to win them over, but then they start wanting me to care more and I just dont.

    Dude, thats not cool, Alex chides in his warm way. I always make a point of disclosing Im not looking for anything serious. I just wanna hang out, be friends, see what happens If I were ever in a court of law I could point to the transcript. But something about the whole scenario seems to bother him, despite all his mild-mannered bravado. I think to an extent it is, like, sinister, he says, cause I know that the average girl will think that theres a chance that she can turn the tables. If I were like, Hey, I just wanna bone, very few people would want to meet up with you

    Do you think this culture is misogynistic? he asks lightly.

    Sex Has Become So Easy

    I call it the Dating Apocalypse, says a woman in New York, aged 29.

    As the polar ice caps melt and the earth churns through the Sixth Extinction, another unprecedented phenomenon is taking place, in the realm of sex. Hookup culture, which has been percolating for about a hundred years, has collided with dating apps, which have acted like a wayward meteor on the now dinosaur-like rituals of courtship. We are in uncharted territory when it comes to Tinder et al., says Justin Garcia, a research scientist at Indiana Universitys Kinsey Institute for Research in Sex, Gender, and Reproduction. There have been two major transitions in heterosexual mating in the last four million years, he says. The first was around 10,000 to 15,000 years ago, in the agricultural revolution, when we became less migratory and more settled, leading to the establishment of marriage as a cultural contract. And the second major transition is with the rise of the Internet.

    People used to meet their partners through proximity, through family and friends, but now Internet meeting is surpassing every other form. Its changing so much about the way we act both romantically and sexually, Garcia says. It is unprecedented from an evolutionary standpoint. As soon as people could go online they were using it as a way to find partners to date and have sex with. In the 90s it was Craigslist and AOL chat rooms, then Match.com and Kiss.com. But the lengthy, heartfelt e-mails exchanged by the main characters in Youve Got Mail (1998) seem positively Victorian in comparison to the messages sent on the average dating app today. Ill get a text that says, Wanna fuck? says Jennifer, 22, a senior at Indiana University Southeast, in New Albany. Theyll tell you, Come over and sit on my face, says her friend, Ashley, 19.

    Mobile dating went mainstream about five years ago; by 2012 it was overtaking online dating. In February, one study reported there were nearly 100 million peopleperhaps 50 million on Tinder aloneusing their phones as a sort of all-day, every-day, handheld singles club, where they might find a sex partner as easily as theyd find a cheap flight to Florida. Its like ordering Seamless, says Dan, the investment banker, referring to the online food-delivery service. But youre ordering a person.

    The comparison to online shopping seems an apt one. Dating apps are the free-market economy come to sex. The innovation of Tinder was the swipethe flick of a finger on a picture, no more elaborate profiles necessary and no more fear of rejection; users only know whether theyve been approved, never when theyve been discarded. OkCupid soon adopted the function. Hinge, which allows for more information about a matchs circle of friends through Facebook, and Happn, which enables G.P.S. tracking to show whether matches have recently crossed paths, use it too. Its telling that swiping has been jocularly incorporated into advertisements for various products, a nod to the notion that, online, the act of choosing consumer brands and sex partners has become interchangeable.

    Its instant gratification, says Jason, 26, a Brooklyn photographer, and a validation of your own attractiveness by just, like, swiping your thumb on an app. You see some pretty girl and you swipe and its, like, oh, she thinks youre attractive too, so its really addicting, and you just find yourself mindlessly doing it. Sex has become so easy, says John, 26, a marketing executive in New York. I can go on my phone right now and no doubt I can find someone I can have sex with this evening, probably before midnight.

    And is this good for women? Since the emergence of flappers and moderns in the 1920s, the debate about what is lost and gained for women in casual sex has been raging, and is raging stillparticularly among women. Some, like Atlantic writer Hanna Rosin, see hookup culture as a boon: The hookup culture is bound up with everything thats fabulous about being a young woman in 2012the freedom, the confidence. But others lament the way the extreme casualness of sex in the age of Tinder leaves many women feeling de-valued. Its rare for a woman of our generation to meet a man who treats her like a priority instead of an option, wrote Erica Gordon on the Gen Y Web site Elite Daily, in 2014.

    It is the very abundance of options provided by online dating which may be making men less inclined to treat any particular woman as a priority, according to David Buss, a professor of psychology at the University of Texas at Austin who specializes in the evolution of human sexuality. Apps like Tinder and OkCupid give people the impression that there are thousands or millions of potential mates out there, Buss says. One dimension of this is the impact it has on mens psychology. When there is a surplus of women, or a perceived surplus of women, the whole mating system tends to shift towards short-term dating. Marriages become unstable. Divorces increase. Men dont have to commit, so they pursue a short-term mating strategy. Men are making that shift, and women are forced to go along with it in order to mate at all.

    Now hold on there a minute. Short-term mating strategies seem to work for plenty of women too; some dont want to be in committed relationships, either, particularly those in their 20s who are focusing on their education and launching careers. Alex the Wall Streeter is overly optimistic when he assumes that every woman he sleeps with would turn the tables and date him seriously if she could. And yet, his assumption may be a sign of the more sinister thing he references, the big fish swimming underneath the ice: For young women the problem in navigating sexuality and relationships is still gender inequality, says Elizabeth Armstrong, a professor of sociology at the University of Michigan who specializes in sexuality and gender. Young women complain that young men still have the power to decide when something is going to be serious and when something is notthey can go, Shes girlfriend material, shes hookup material. There is still a pervasive double standard. We need to puzzle out why women have made more strides in the public arena than in the private arena.


    More: Vanityfair

  8. #157
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    Nothing changed dating and the gender dynamic as much as dating apps/websites in recent times - let's say the last 20 years or so - or even since third wave feminism arrived on the scene 50 years back. It's a massive game changer. Dating in the nineties itself was still largely like dating in the seventies or eighties for most men and women. Somewhat older people who have only dated before the spread of the internet only seem to be vaguely aware of this, if at all. I can recall the time when there was still a stigma attached to online dating, it was something very hush-hush, a source of embarrassment. Few would've admitted to it as internet dating was still associated with losers, cheaters and perverts. And yet today most new relations start on the internet. Something changed between 2005 and 2015. In 20 years we went from stigma to normalisation.

    Digital dating on an industrial scale amplified certain negative natural tendencies of men and women and which already went unchecked in the deregulated dating market for decades, namely: (quality) men pursuing short term relationships (because they can) and women chasing after quality men and monkey branching - upgrading from one man to another when possible (also because they can). The reason for this is that compared to pre-internet times we all seem to have infinitely more options. No-one has to be restricted to their own direct, real life social bubble anymore when it comes to finding a partner, provided one is connected to the internet.

    Ironically, this abundance is partially an illusion, and options have become fewer for everyone except high status men (no wonder then that men with power support feminism).

    Over a century ago you would've "dated" locally, mostly in your own socio-economic class, women too. Women's choice was between marrying some guy or 'dying' from hunger and thirst. Faced with that prospect, women's expectations were unsurprisingly limited. A man simply doesn't have to be 6ft plus a bunch of arbitrary things in such circumstances, moreover, the average woman had no realistic chance of ever being wifed up by someone from the top 20% of desirable men anyway.

    Third wave feminism made it theoretically possible for women to not marry & yet live or to only pursue the very best of men, many did. But the internet weaponized this new gender dynamic in a big way. It gave every woman direct access to all the best men through dating websites, the internet is oddly egalitarian that way. The other side of the coin is: "quality men", regardless of them being desirable because of being Chads or bad boys or simply accomplished/high status or maybe just rich, confronted with this abundance of women, don't settle for anypne in particular - and when or if they finally do, it will still be with a high status woman.

    The average woman still doesn't have that chance despite the new gender dynamic creating an illusion of possibility, instead she ends up being used for sex by high status men on dating sites/apps. But the illusion is so strong, and the practical need to marry a man so weak, that women don't view average men as good enough anymore. Even being above average is no guarantee - a guy may have a very nice income, drive a fancy car, possess tons of provider traits, do all the clich romantic stuff (simpmaxxing ), her mother may be completely onboard with it, and yet be described as boring and undesirable. His sin? Just having his life in order. If you're that guy you're probably wondering why you are deemed to be inadequate. Or what's wrong with women these days. But you're primarly a victim of a deregulated dating market: modern men and women still act on the same instincts of over a century ago when pursuing the best mating strategies, but their desires are no longer canalized as they once were under patriarchy, which ensured that the maximum amount of families were created.

    This problem lies at the heart of the dating apocalypse and our own demographic collapse. Patriarchy probably won't return and if it does it can never be as effective anymore - not unless there's a rather comprehensive destruction of civilization. It's utter science fiction, but what is far likelier to happen is that people in the future, but not in our lifetime, will see the novelty of designer partners and designer babies. The "perfect", tailormade partners won't be human but the babies will be. At some point that will become the new normal. That's going to be "the solution" to this crisis, eventually, as dating grinds to a halt and no-one marries anymore. (Below) average people will start relationships with "robots", but eventually everyone will start doing it.

    It may seem dystopian for someone living in 2020 thinking this through, yet at the same time it would solve a lot of problems - while creating others. Equally disturbingly, it may very well be a masonic long term goal anyway: replacing humans with robots. After all, once robots are sufficiently advanced to take on the role of a partner of a human being, why not simply replace humans with something more cost-effective while at the same time violating the sanctity of God's creation? For a Christian this evolution is deeply disturbing. Noah's Flood was the result of a first Satanic attempt to wipe out mankind, it may happen again - there's nothing new under the sun.
    [28-08, 00:40] Huginn ok Muninn: if only sigurd were here

  9. #158
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    I just skimmed this thread because it's the most recent thread. I don't Tinder. I am 50 years old, never married, and haven't had sex since I was 29. My last boyfriend was in 2005 (I was 35) and we couldn't have sex because he had a medical problem. We didn't break up because of that. We broke up because he spent New Year's Eve with his friends and didn't invite me.

    I did join eharmony for a year but I didn't find anyone close by and I wasn't willing to move.

    I think I'll remain celibate and unmarried for the rest of my life.

    I have a crush on my chiropractor but that is going nowhere. I'm okay with it being platonic.

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    I'm 21 and I don't use dating-apps either. I prefer going to a festival or some public place where everyone gathers and then just talk to girls and guys. That way it's more personal, and you can actually get to know someone who shares your interests, and even make some friends in the process.

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    Sharon Stone, 62, admits she has tried online dating but found it 'dismal' because it was impossible to feel the chemistry

    Sharon Stone wants to write a book about her 'dismal' online dating experiences.



    The 62-year-old actress - who has three sons - has experimented with matchmaking app Bumble but doesn't believe it's the right place to look for love because there's no substitute for real 'chemistry', so she would like to document her stories as a warning to others.

    'Honestly the whole thing was so dismal that I now want to write a book of short stories about my online dating experiences,' stated the Casino actress. 'Dating sites are just not a successful thing. Because real chemistry, that frisson, that happens in the air - not on a site.'

    The Sliver star added, 'And people are becoming less socially adept because of those sites.

    'They no longer know how to behave over dinner, be in a relationship or communicate. I don't want a "text relationship" with someone I'm actually dating, for example. I find that dismal.'

    And Sharon thinks it is 'sad' that people don't really flirt anymore and blames technology for taking away physical interactions.

    She told Telegraph magazine: 'I've realized that people are just not whistling any more.

    'It was a lot of fun when we were allowed to whistle and flirt, but that era has passed.


    'It is sad. But people just aren't like that any more.

    'Technology has taken away the whole interpersonal flirtation thing anyway, so now it's not even in the air: people just don't flirt face-to-face.

    'And I don't think it has anything to do with you or me [getting older].'

    While she's been an advocate for the MeToo moment, the Basic Instinct star insisted she 'doesn't really care' if guys touch her butt or refer to her with terms such as 'honey' or 'darling' as she thinks there are more important things to fight over.

    She said: 'I feel like I don't really need to get into the weeds on all these other things.

    'I don't care if people call me those things. Frankly, I don't really care if they pat me on the rear. I just feel like all of that stuff is such a small victory.

    'And maybe it's because I'm 62 and have been through so much that I'm able to sort out what really needs my attention - and what are just things and people that are going to fade away anyway.'

    Daily Mail

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