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Thread: Why Is Nearly Every Single Woman On This Forum Taken While Most Men Are Single?

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    In Swedish nationalistic circles there are both men complaining about the lack of good women and women complaining about the lack of good men. I used to be a member of a Facebook group for patriotic women (it had over 1000 members before it was shut down) and in a poll asking about civil status about 40% answered they were single. Surprisingly few admitted that they were searching for a partner, though, most of the singles opted for "if the right ones shows up" or something similar. There has also been some match making attempts with poor results. Indeed, it seems a bit tricky getting people together even if they have the same goals in life (starting a family and raising their children in a traditional manner). I think both men and women (in general) are a little too picky in relation to what they have to offer, most think they deserve something better than they can get. I would also guess traditional women are harder to get since they tend to be even pickier (it could be paralysing thinking about that you need to find someone to spend the rest of your life with and also depend on for several year when you stay at home with children, not just someone to have a good time with) and since they are traditional, they often expect the man to lead and take initiative. I've heard some stories of men who have repeatedly advanced and showed interest in the same woman in spite of initial rejection and eventually the woman gives in, probably when she is convinced that he really cares for her. So it might not be a good strategy to go for quantity rather than choosing a woman with care and court her for a longer period of time before giving up a trying another one.

    Quote Originally Posted by Gegenschlag
    Now that I am older, I am not going to make the same mistake as during my 20s.
    You know that men peak later and are most attractive between 30 and 40, right? Those who aren't successful with women when they are young can work on themselves and get their carrier going, so when they are around 35 they could well be among the top tier men and have women who are in their early twenties. A woman who is not considered attractive at 20 can't do the same. Life isn't fair and we can't expect someone else to even out the injustices we feel inflicted by.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Vittra View Post
    In Swedish nationalistic circles there are both men complaining about the lack of good women and women complaining about the lack of good men. I used to be a member of a Facebook group for patriotic women (it had over 1000 members before it was shut down) and in a poll asking about civil status about 40% answered they were single. Surprisingly few admitted that they were searching for a partner, though, most of the singles opted for "if the right ones shows up" or something similar.
    What was the general age group among these single women?

    From what I've observed through comment sections of Facebook and the likes, patriotic women (at least the ones vocal about their convictions) are mostly older women. Probably between 40 and 60. May that be a part of the explanation, as women this age likely aren't looking for a partner to establish a family with?
    A nation is an organic thing, historically defined.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vittra
    I've heard some stories of men who have repeatedly advanced and showed interest in the same woman in spite of initial rejection and eventually the woman gives in, probably when she is convinced that he really cares for her. So it might not be a good strategy to go for quantity rather than choosing a woman with care and court her for a longer period of time before giving up a trying another one.
    No means no unless no means yes, Vittra? Tricky advice in our day and age - in the era of rape culture. First you're a creep, two weeks later a stalker, then maybe a rapist... and after that a husband?

    Me thinks this would've been reasonable advice in 1825 - when women couldn't just say yes to any ol' guy who came up to them - but now it's safe(r) to assume that if a woman tells you she isn't interested, she isn't interested. She also has eyes in her head - all these mind games are outdated. And if a trad lady were to meet a suitable guy she's not going to play them either in the current year, that would be a blunder of epic proportions. It wil be "Let me be your valkyrie, I'll carry you shield into battle, my lord!" before you know it. It's called being smart.

    Quote Originally Posted by Vittra
    I would also guess traditional women are harder to get since they tend to be even pickier.
    Maybe. But a number of such women may also be off the market (and not very active on Facebook) precisely because they want to marry young and found someone suitable early on in life. I suppose not having studies as a priority will probably enable such a scenario. They would then exist below the radar of cyberspace.
    “When a nation forgets her skill in war, when her religion becomes a mockery, when the whole nation becomes a nation of money-grabbers, then the wild tribes, the barbarians drive in.“ – Robert Howard

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    Quote Originally Posted by Žoreišar View Post
    What was the general age group among these single women?

    From what I've observed through comment sections of Facebook and the likes, patriotic women (at least the ones vocal about their convictions) are mostly older women. Probably between 40 and 60. May that be a part of the explanation, as women this age likely aren't looking for a partner to establish a family with?
    Most of them had passed 30 so yes, age is probably a factor, but I've also met a few younger who still find it hard to meet someone.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Chlodovech View Post
    No means no unless no means yes, Vittra? Tricky advice in our day and age - in the era of rape culture. First you're a creep, two weeks later a stalker, then maybe a rapist... and after that a husband?
    Can probably be a dangerous game, but I have at least two friends who were successful with this modus operandi. One of them hanging on for a good three-four months, and the other going the route of the "nice-guy-shoulder-to-cry-on" for at least a year. Dunno how long it'll last, though.

    Quote Originally Posted by Vittra View Post
    Most of them had passed 30 so yes, age is probably a factor, but I've also met a few younger who still find it hard to meet someone.
    I have a hard time imagining what the problem could be, if we're talking about Nationalist/patriotic women. Women in these circles are outnumbered by men by something like 1 to 20. Put a guy in a position like that, and I doubt very much that he'd be complaining about the dating climate and "not enough good women around". I honestly have to wonder if Nationalist men really are that hopeless...
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    @Thoreidar: The second guy sounds more like beta-orbiting, TBH. I'm inclined to believe he didn't put his cards on the table given what you said, so there was never a way for him to be a "creep", not unless he rumaged around in her washbin or something. The first one could still use a healthy dose of selfrespect.

    I want to remind you that you also know two guys who found their partner on Tinder, so go figure.

    I know a guy who found his wife by trying to court her for years (this was still allowed in the nineties and the early 2000s) - and the entire village laughed at his antics because she kept saying no for a decade or so. She genuinely wasn't interested in him at first, I think she eventually came to see him as a plan B while also taking pity on him. They're still married, with children.
    “When a nation forgets her skill in war, when her religion becomes a mockery, when the whole nation becomes a nation of money-grabbers, then the wild tribes, the barbarians drive in.“ – Robert Howard

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    Quote Originally Posted by Chlodovech View Post
    @Thoreidar: The second guy sounds more like beta-orbiting, TBH. I'm inclined to believe he didn't put his cards on the table given what you said, so there was never a way for him to be a "creep", not unless he rumaged around in her washbin or something.
    Yeah, beta-orbiting would describe it quite well. He was as her caring friend and shoulder to cry on while she was in a relationship with another guy. Everyone knew he was just hoping for a chance with her himself, and I always thought it was a bit pathetic, and I would have given him zero chance in hell. But, for whatever reason, he made it work.

    Quote Originally Posted by Chlodovech View Post
    I want to remind you that you also know two guys who found their partner on Tinder, so go figure.
    Two guys and one girl, that is. All of them settled, two of them with kids, and one of them planning for children. The woman that the one of the guys is with, tried getting me to bed the first time I met her on a night out, a few years prior. So it doesn't quite clear the name of the stereotypical "Tinder-girl". Not something I would get with, but they seem to be happy at least.

    Quote Originally Posted by Chlodovech View Post
    I know a guy who found his wife by trying to court her for years (this was still allowed in the nineties and the early 2000s) - and the entire village laughed at his antics because she kept saying no for a decade or so. She genuinely wasn't interested in him at first, I think she eventually came to see him as a plan B while also taking pity on him. They're still married, with children.
    See! Women aren't all devoid of empathy, Chlod.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Žoreišar View Post
    Two guys and one girl, that is. All of them settled, two of them with kids, and one of them planning for children.
    Meanwhile, the rest of the world views Tinder as a flirtapp.

    Quote Originally Posted by Thoreidar
    See! Women aren't all devoid of empathy, Chlod.
    She was a decent Catholic girl, it's not the same thing. Her Catholicism evens things out. She may have approached the whole matter as a work of mercy. And she certainly didn't marry him for money, as he's a teacher in high school.

    @Gegenschlag: Maybe relevant, maybe not - but seeing that you're Swiss I'm reminded of a noteworthy statement of Sigurd, whom is at home in the Alps himself and respected in many other valleys beside his own. He once suggested that our lack of female Swiss members is because they're intrinsically dutiful and have no time for such frivolous things like the internet - they're too busy being trad wife material, you see. A joke, surely, but what if it's Switzerland's best kept secret? Switzerland was also the last country in Europe to legalize voting for women.
    “When a nation forgets her skill in war, when her religion becomes a mockery, when the whole nation becomes a nation of money-grabbers, then the wild tribes, the barbarians drive in.“ – Robert Howard

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    Quote Originally Posted by Chlodovech View Post
    No means no unless no means yes, Vittra? Tricky advice in our day and age - in the era of rape culture. First you're a creep, two weeks later a stalker, then maybe a rapist... and after that a husband?
    I understand it sounds a bit risky but I do base the advise on real life anecdotes. I know of one guy who really tried to do it the traditional way and it took at least a few months before she started being interested in him and after that they moved slowly. Now, some years later, they are married and soon to be parents. I also have a female friend who used to rent a room in a guys apartment. He was showing some interest in her but she wasn't interested. At some point she changed her mind and I think they have two kids by now. People are more prone to fall in love if they are exposed to each other a certain amount of time and I think this especially applies for women (that we need more time to figure out if we find someone attractive).

    Quote Originally Posted by Chlodovech
    But a number of such women may also be off the market (and not very active on Facebook) precisely because they want to marry young and found someone suitable early on in life.
    My sister has said that the best women find a man before they turn twenty and then stick with him, and that's probably true. I'll leave out the concluding advise of that as an exercise.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Vittra View Post
    My sister has said that the best women find a man before they turn twenty and then stick with him, and that's probably true. I'll leave out the concluding advise of that as an exercise.
    I haven't even heard of anyone finding a long-term partner before the age of twenty, whom they settled and had kids with. Not on this side of the 1980s.
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