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Thread: Today’s Generation Shocked They Might Have To Care For Their Parents

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    Moderator Resist's Avatar
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    Today’s Generation Shocked They Might Have To Care For Their Parents

    Pushing a pram gives a young middle-class man status in Scandinavia. But when will it be just as cool to push your old father around in a wheelchair?

    The Western world is ageing, and someone is going to have to care for all those old folks. But who?

    Swedish gender research Sofia Björk recently completed her doctorate at the University of Gothenburg where she has interviewed 21 middle-aged men and women who have parents who need care.

    Both the men and women in the interviews were surprised that their ageing parents suddenly needed them, Björk said.

    “It was quite a shock to many when they realized that they actually had help their parents. They felt it was unfair, in a way,” she said.

    “It may be because they have grown accustomed to having healthy, independent parents and have believed that they will always be that way. But it may also be that they have been confident that this is something the welfare state will fix for them,” she said.

    Proud dads

    The researcher also interviewed 31 parents who have children under the age of 12. The interviews showed that the men were proud to be a father who is equally involved in their children's lives.

    Today's fathers can been seen pushing a stroller in one hand with a cafe latte in the other, they blog about being a dad, and meet in paternity groups. Taking paternity leave is seen as natural and trendy among many of today's fathers, especially the middle class.

    Björk believes that the ideal of equality has created a new masculinity, where caring for children is part of being a man.

    But when it comes to caring for their parents, it is different, although equality remains the ideal for most people.

    Daughters’ responsibility

    Björk said one person in all of the families was mainly responsible for caring for elderly parents. Where the family included daughters, the responsibility fell on them, she says.

    She has only interviewed people who are caring for their parents. But in larger quantitative studies, it is primarily women who take the main responsibility for their elderly parents, she says.

    “My study found that gender is used as an argument for taking responsibility or not,” she said. “A woman might say, ‘Since I'm a daughter, it's my responsibility.’”

    Björk found that women took more of the workload than men in caring for elderly parents, and that they felt very alone in this responsibility. Several people felt that the responsibility could affect their health and work life.

    A woman with a daughter gets less help

    A 2014 study from Norway shows that a child’s gender plays a central role in how much public help the elderly receive.

    When researchers compared an elderly woman with a daughter and needed aid to an elderly woman with a son and needed aid, they found that the woman with the son would receive 25 per cent more home care than if she had a daughter. This translates to an increase of 120 minutes more services per week.

    The researchers from this study said this shows that the family situation of an elderly person in need of help is taken into consideration when home services are allocated. This is in stark contrast to the Norwegian goal of universal welfare arrangements, which are supposed to be distributed according to the user's needs, and not based on gender.

    Relatives have been given greater responsibility

    Both Norway and Sweden have good welfare programmes for the elderly compared to many other countries.

    But there have been changes in elder care. Politicians in both Norway and Sweden have decided that institutional care should be reduced and that the elderly should live longer at home.

    Although the elderly continue to receive home services, this means the demands on relatives are greater. Among other things, they will need to help coordinate services, says Björk.

    “Expanding public elder care was a major gender equality programme because it freed women from having sole responsibility for that care. When this approach is cut back, it’s also a setback for gender equality,” she said.
    https://sciencenordic.com/aging-fors...arents/1555158

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    Anachronism "Friend of Germanics"
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    There's no such thing as "gender equality," and certainly nothing "scientific" in believing there should be. Feminists are mentally ill.
    Most people think as they are trained to think, and most people make a majority.

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    There are insurances for that , in Germany called "Pflegeversicherung" , which is part of social security insurance as there are for pension and illness like Obamacare .
    Mk 10:18 What do you call me a good master, no-one is good .

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    When I returned home from military service, I resided in the garret above my parent's home and only worked worked part-time so that I could care for my elderly father while my much younger mother worked full-time.

    When my father eventually passed away in a local hospital due, in part, to respiratory complications, I got on with my life as a single adult working man.
    Aside from an ever increasing number of mortals who have willfully chosen to worship Satan and his minions, our battle has always been against the powers and principalities operating surreptitiously throughout this twisted world.

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    Senior Member Coillearnach's Avatar
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    This is partly a failure of the parents, they probably have not raised their children to have duties, maybe the children never saw them uphold any duties, and so their children recognize none.

    Caring for your parents is absolutely awful nowadays though due to small family sizes and increased longevity, especially if you live in a failed first world country like mine with terrible elder care services. Imagine you are an only child with a parent with Dementia/other Alzheimer's and a small child at the same time (they easily pose a lethal risk to adults and especially to kids if not watched 24/7), or your parents are self-destructing just as you start out in the world because your adulthood has been delayed by extensive schooling and they have not taken care of themselves and have thereby dragged your future down with their bad choices.

    I don't believe that female children should immediately be saddled with the responsibility if it comes to it but whoever has the resources and the time or, if you are lucky to have multiple and helpful siblings, some kind of shared arrangement. The sensibility of adherence to agrarian divisions of labor does not make sense in an industrial world.

    When researchers compared an elderly woman with a daughter and needed aid to an elderly woman with a son and needed aid, they found that the woman with the son would receive 25 per cent more home care than if she had a daughter. This translates to an increase of 120 minutes more services per week.
    I wonder why. Is this kind of thing tied to financials of the caregiver or...?

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    When researchers compared an elderly woman with a daughter and needed aid to an elderly woman with a son and needed aid, they found that the woman with the son would receive 25 per cent more home care than if she had a daughter. This translates to an increase of 120 minutes more services per week.
    Quote Originally Posted by Coillearnach View Post
    I wonder why. Is this kind of thing tied to financials of the caregiver or...?
    Let's clarify that paragraph a bit...

    When (((researchers))) compared an elderly woman with a daughter and needed aid to an elderly woman with a son and needed aid, (((they))) found that the woman with the son would receive 25 per cent more home care than if she had a daughter. This translates to an increase of 120 minutes more services per week.
    Make more sense now? It's propaganda.
    Most people think as they are trained to think, and most people make a majority.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Huginn ok Muninn View Post
    Let's clarify that paragraph a bit...



    Make more sense now? It's propaganda.
    Do you have a list of people on that project? Did all their last names end in -stein? On top of that, do you have any actual evidence that it was faked? Making claims like this without any evidence is a big mistake, it erodes credibility and blinds people when actual ethnocentric malice occurs.

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    For other generations is was much easier to take care of their parents and grandparents because the children were typically married and they used to have extended family housing or lived in each other's vicinity. The parents could move in or visit for extended times and it would be a plus because they could spend time and take care of their grandchildren. So it was a win-win situation, for the parents and for their children. The family was much more closer knit. But nowadays we've complications for several reasons:

    - today's generation doesn't get married at the age other generations used to marry, or at all - previously, peoples used to marry as soon as they reached adulthood or shortly afterwards, especially the women. For a single, adult child it's much more difficult to aid the parents, both financially and time-wise.
    - today's women typically work - the profession of housewife is almost entirely extinct. Without a daughter who stays at home and takes exclusive care of the household, there is little time for the parents.
    - economical factors - today's families can't afford housing that would be big enough to include the parents. I know a lot of peoples who live in studio apartments or who share the accommodations with roommates, so bringing their parents in would be difficult or out of the question.
    - today's generation is much more likely to leave their native towns/cities/regions or immigrate to a different country altogether. Back in the day, the family would be concentrated in roughly the same areas. Nowadays a lot of adults immigrate to where they can find better jobs, which puts a lot of distance between them and their parents.
    - too much individualism. The sense of traditional family is more or less dead in modern society, and so forth.

    Myself I've considered relocation however I've always kept my parents in mind. While now they're both still healthy and can take care of themselves, in a few years they might retire, and old age is old age. At some point in the future they might need my help. Fortunately, my parents have a big house, which they could afford to buy back in the day. But my husband and I are also on the path of purchasing a house for ourselves, and our future family. So the future situation will be ideal for my parents to visit for extended times, or move in at some point. One thing is for sure, I wouldn't put them in an elderly asylum when they become older, not against their will as other peoples do. At least not in this country where the quality of such places is questionable. I've heard that in the West some elderly asylums are well kept, even luxury with a lot of health options, and some elderly peoples voluntarily want to seek a place there. Well, I've nothing against it in that case, but it's not something I'd want to do myself. I'd rather have my parents near me, share the life and enjoy their grandkids (hopefully) when they're older.

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    Senior Member Idis's Avatar
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    I've actually been under the impression that some people tend to leave their parents nest much later these days, particularly in certain countries. However it seems to be the other way around, it's the parents who have to take care of their "adult babies" more than would be usual...

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    There is one of those adult babies in my extended family. One of my sister in law has a son over 40 year old, only works now and then, was divorced, married again and is now in a separation status with one child. He still lives at home living off his mothers finances. He does not even help with basic house chores.
    We keep telling her, kick him out..........

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