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Thread: How Do You Feel About Ageing?

  1. #51
    Senior Member Volk und Rasse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Johan the Blind View Post
    I don't mind getting older (I'm 56 now) but as the years pass I feel more regret for things I never did, the girl I never made a pass at, the roads I never traveled. And for the things I did do, it's getting to the point where I'm not sure if they actually happened the way I remember them, or if I'm remembering them wrong- or even just making them up but believing them anyway (it's the 'the older I get the better I used to be' principle).

    I wanted to be famous, someone people would remember after I'm gone. As it stands, I've got my children but I feel like such a failure to them sometimes it kills me and I don't really know how to turn it around at this point. Hell, Hitler was my age when he died and (for good or bad) look at what he accomplished in his lifetime- I'd just as soon not be portrayed as a mass murderer by most of the world when I die, but his name is likely to live forever. Ivar the Boneless, Frederick the Great, Julius Caesar- all names for the history books... and here I am, very likely to be just another nameless man with no great deeds to his name. No paragraph in a history book, no statue, nothing.

    THAT is what bothers me the most about aging- not the failing health, not being the man I once was, but lack of great accomplishments and remembrance. 56 is by no means ancient, but time marches on and I feel my opportunities to refashion myself into someone to be remembered are fading.
    Just try to cultivate yourself as a virtuous person. That's the best way to be remembered.

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  3. #52
    Senior Member Skärmträl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Johan the Blind View Post
    As it stands, I've got my children but I feel like such a failure to them sometimes it kills me and I don't really know how to turn it around at this point.
    But in the end, maybe those close to us will really only care about the way you behaved to them, not to the world at large.

    Seems like a modern-day curse where we're able to compare ourselves not only to our family, friends and neighbors, but -- thanks to advanced mass communication and lack of hierarchies -- to every single person on the planet. Seven billion people, all potentially better than you. And with easy access to historical records, there are even more potentially superior people to consider.

    It's a soul-crushing perspective and I think the only way out of it is to realize it's not realistic, it's not natural and it's forced upon us by the strange circumstances of modern life.

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  5. #53
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    Quote Originally Posted by Johan the Blind View Post
    I wanted to be famous, someone people would remember after I'm gone. As it stands, I've got my children but I feel like such a failure to them sometimes it kills me and I don't really know how to turn it around at this point. Hell, Hitler was my age when he died and (for good or bad) look at what he accomplished in his lifetime- I'd just as soon not be portrayed as a mass murderer by most of the world when I die, but his name is likely to live forever. Ivar the Boneless, Frederick the Great, Julius Caesar- all names for the history books... and here I am, very likely to be just another nameless man with no great deeds to his name. No paragraph in a history book, no statue, nothing.

    THAT is what bothers me the most about aging- not the failing health, not being the man I once was, but lack of great accomplishments and remembrance. 56 is by no means ancient, but time marches on and I feel my opportunities to refashion myself into someone to be remembered are fading.
    At least you've got your children. That's better than any statue or torch of memorial could ever be.
    A nation is an organic thing, historically defined.
    A wave of passionate energy which unites past, present and future generations

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  7. #54
    Senior Member schwab's Avatar
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    @Johan

    ..........As it stands, I've got my children but I feel like such a failure to them sometimes it kills me and I don't really know how to turn it around at this point...........


    You can turn things around by cultivating love for your children. Get to know them in a deeper relationship. Become a father that cares. That should be your highlights on this earth.

    A few weeks ago my son-in- laws father committed suicide. He was close to 80. He was divorced for many years. His hobby was to go to Russia and find love there. He brought some of those Russian women here. He got married and divorced several times. On the end he was lonely.
    He failed to have a relationship with his 2 sons. He knew he had grand children but never saw them. He just lived a few miles away. I did not know him either.
    As it stands now, nobody cares, nobody even wants his ashes. This is very sad.

    You have been tinkering with several religious beliefs. You need to come back to Christianity, read the Scriptures, become non denominational, churches are failing us in many ways.
    GOD bless you Johan..........

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  9. #55
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    Quote Originally Posted by schwab View Post
    A few weeks ago my son-in- laws father committed suicide. He was close to 80. He was divorced for many years. His hobby was to go to Russia and find love there. He brought some of those Russian women here. He got married and divorced several times. On the end he was lonely.
    He failed to have a relationship with his 2 sons. He knew he had grand children but never saw them. He just lived a few miles away. I did not know him either.
    As it stands now, nobody cares, nobody even wants his ashes. This is very sad.
    How heartbreaking! I will pray for the departed soul of that poor man.
    “She could never be a saint, but she thought she could be a martyr if they killed her quick.”
    ― Flannery O'Connor

  10. #56
    Member Johan the Blind's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by schwab View Post
    You have been tinkering with several religious beliefs. You need to come back to Christianity, read the Scriptures, become non denominational, churches are failing us in many ways.
    GOD bless you Johan..........
    I have read the Torah, the New Testament, and the Qur'an many times over and the overarching impression I get is that while the New Testament presents a kind, loving God, both the Torah and Qur'an present a very, very different God- to the point where I think they're describing a different God altogether. Inasmuch as that may be, I don't believe in the divinity of Jesus for one minute so that pretty much puts me outside the bounds of any brand of Christianity.

    As it stands, I'll simply count myself as a polytheistic Deist, holding with the possibility of many gods and/or goddesses in play at any given time. For the time being, I choose to honor certain of these gods in the old Germanic fashion- but at the same time I do not deny the possibility that the Abrahamic god exists as well. If I were to move away from this, the only other path I could see would be that of the old-school Cathars- still a polytheistic world-view, but with a different take on How Things Are.

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  12. #57
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    How do I feel about aging? It's better than the alternative.

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    Quote Originally Posted by schwab View Post
    Crusades? That was 100% wrong........
    What are the Scriptures teaching?
    Go ye in all the world and kill all the unbelievers? That is what Islam teaches my friend.
    You know what the Bible says.......
    Actually, that's precisely what the Qur'an DOESN'T teach. Sura 2:256 states in no uncertain terms, "There is no compulsion in the acceptance of the religion." Whatever individuals may do 'in the field', the fact remains that this one sura precludes ANY 'conversion or death' actions; any coercion imposed on one to convert is a sin. Note, also, that there is no command to 'kill all the unbelievers' simply because they don't believe in God- rather, if one actually reads the text, one finds that in each case Muslims are enjoined to fight infidels after THEY have been attacked, and they are fighting for defensive purposes. Otherwise, it's supposed to be a 'live and let live' arrangement.

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    I do not like aging, I see it as a sort of disease. Already in our 30s, we can see some effects of aging:

    • In the mid-20s, cognitive decline begins.
    • After peaking in the mid-20s, female fertility declines.
    • After age 30 the mass of human body is decreased until 70 years and then shows damping oscillations.
    • People over 35 years of age are at increasing risk for losing strength in the ciliary muscle, which leads to presbyopia, a difficulty focusing on close objects. Most people experience presbyopia by age 45–50.
    And there's still more to go:
    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ageing#Effects

    I am in my 40s, and while I feel certain effects of aging, I am still happy that I do not have to deal with others. I would rather live a shorter, healthier life than reach 100s with Alzheimer's and other typical aging ills. Thankfully, we are on the path to life extension, with halting or postponing some of the effects of aging. I do my best to postpone the effects of aging through restricting my caloric intake, regular exercise and a decent amount of sleep (I am not always able to respect the latter due to my line of work and being a single mother, but I try). Here is how the amount of sleep one gets can affect their mortality:

    People who live the longest report sleeping for six to seven hours each night. Lack of sleep (<5 hours) more than doubles the risk of death from cardiovascular disease, but too much sleep (>9 hours) is associated with a doubling of the risk of death, though not primarily from cardiovascular disease. Sleeping more than 7 to 8 hours per day has been consistently associated with increased mortality, though the cause is probably other factors such as depression and socioeconomic status, which would correlate statistically.
    I also take supplements which have been found to combat some effects of aging successfully in both animals and humans. I'd like to think that I started early, so I am optimistic about my next decade.

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    I am 73 years old and look forward with optimism to the future. I have some health problems that my 89 year old sister shares such as trigger finger, essential tremor, arthritis that are associated with the heritage of Scandinavian peoples according to studies. I also have diabetes 2. I keep a balance in life. During days I work on our land cutting trees, mowing or building and evenings I read or do family research on the computer. When the days are too hot, since we live on the Gulf of Mexico, I go to a fitness centre every other day and work out. Some persons in our family during the Middle Ages lived to be 100 years. I recently inquired of the doctor when I reach 103 years will I be a mess with arthritis. He replied, if I reach 103 years I will be a mess. I told him I don't worry about the 103.... I sleep about 7 hours a night, eat good foods, raise chickens for fresh eggs, read and write to stay sharp, and don't get too hooked on meds. Also have a good black lab, Hank, I can pet when I get stressed.

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