I have to share this with you guys...

I don't like Stormfront, but this made me laugh!

1) The brilliant blue eyes of the actors would have been "toned down" or
changed to brown so as not to offend anyone.

2) They would have pulled big, nasty, White guys from the muddy bowels of
Mordor instead of black-skinned Uruk-Hai

3) The Orcs would have blond hair

4) The Elven princess Arwen [played by Liv Tyler] would have at least one
nude sex scene with a "different" Aragorn [played by Wesley Snipes or Denzel

5) The LOTR theme song "May It Be" by Enya would be replaced by a rap from
Li'l Kim to appeal to the youth demographic (and Li'l Kim would make a cameo
appearance in the film, complete with blonde wig and blue contact lenses)

6) During Boromir's death scene, Aragorn would promise that he "will not
let the Light-brown City fall" instead of "White City"

7) The Ring of Power would show Hebrew text that reads: "Do as I say, not
as I do"

8) The narrator of the opening scenes would have a New York accent, rather
than that "stuffy British" accent

9) The Ring Bearer would put the ring in his pocket and keep it. End of
story, you schmucks

10) Middle-earth would undergo mandatory diversity and tolerance training,
and the invasion would be referred to as "immigration"