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Thread: Chivalry

  1. #31
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    Women no longer wear huge crinoline dresses and whale-bone corsets. They have to work and compete in sphere which were once male-dominated and they have proved themselves to be strong and capable.

    No, I always take a seat on a train or bus when I can. I would tend to give deference to the elderly rather than to women in particular. There are a lot of foul women out there who do not appreciate male deference, so it is wasted on them in any case.

    However, I will not allow a woman I am accompanying to go first down or last up a staircase, nor without a rail on the other side. In places of spiritual significance or just generally I prefer men on the left and women on the right (this is a very ancient format). I will not walk down the street with her on the road side of me, and I will always open doors for women and the elderly.

  2. #32
    Senior Member MockTurtle's Avatar
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    "Others said parents, more often than not, raise their daughters to be independent and that they don't need anything from the opposite sex."
    Bingo!

    Nowadays it is difficult to tell apart most of the women I encounter from men in terms of temperament. This isn't just the result of parental methods in childraising, it's also encouraged heavily in our education system. Plus, even if one does try to be "chivalrous" you run the risk of being called "sexist" or accused of "sexual harassment" and facing all sorts of painful litigation. Why bother?

  3. #33
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    Chivalry is defined as courteous behavior towards a lady. To be treated as a lady, one must dress as a lady, and act as a lady. The very same rules applied when chivalry was still common. The problem is, there aren't many ladies today. Feminism has abolished the need for femininity, and thus, the need for chivalry. Empowerment for women now means being provocative (whether that be through clothing, promiscuity, loud words, actions, creating controversy) and competing with men, which is very unladylike. Feminism refuses to accept whatever makes a woman seemingly weak, yet those same things (being demure, modest, nurturing and gentle) are what makes her beautiful and worthy of respect. Women have been so conditioned to be like men, to dress as men, act as men, work as men, and to live as men, that men have been pushed from their roles in society. They no longer feel the need to be masculine and do anything that would represent such. There is no point when the modern woman can do it all. There is no point when most women now aren't even deserving of an open door.

    I appreciate chivalry. It makes me feel as though I am someone worthy of consideration in this world.

  4. #34
    Senior Member Maelstrom's Avatar
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    Generally I will get out of my seat for an elderly person. They always appreciate the gesture and I feel that they actually deserve some respect.Women can be quite snobbish and take chivalry in a bad way.

    Needless to say I think that almost every decent guy that I've encountered subtley displays some sort of chivalry. It's one of those things that make a man a man.

    Chivarly should never be expected.

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    Senior Member Thrymheim's Avatar
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    I don't see any need for men to get up for me, not until I'm heavily pregnant or old. As to holding doors I do that myself, and it is normally whichever one of us who gets to the door first that holds it open. The only time I do want that type of behaviour it is if I'm wearing a silly impractical formal gown and high heels and simply can't manage the stairs/cobbles without an arm! As to car doors and the like, well as I'm the driver and therefore have the keys...
    chivalry can work either way I suppose it depends upon which partner is dominant, whatever one is going to call it going out of ones way for someone special is always appreciated.

    I see your back FA thought I recognised the question! :p
    Cattle die, kinsmen die,
    the self must also die;
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    For the one who is able to achieve it.

    Sayings of the High One.

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    I do not believe in chivalry but in general politeness. I help those who seem to need it hence I'd offer my seat to elderly, pregnant or sick people but not to females per se. I will always hold doors if somebody is directly behind me or in the former category.
    Modern women do not need any such protection anymore and are independent just like men. However, a lot of them seem to think that they deserve both, independence and chivalry, and I am definately not going to affirm such selfish behaviour in any way. If women want equality then they will need to lose their former priviledges,too.
    Ceterum censeo Iudaeam esse delendam.

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    Everyone keeps saying women don't want it...:

    Have you asked a lady lately? Or do you just figure?

    Actually I do know that a lot of women are different now, but not always. Maybe us women do not expect it anymore, and leave it at that. It is not only women who have changed it is men also!

    I think for a male, you could generally tell by looking at a women if she will appreciate it or not, what I am saying is maybe not open the door for the white girl with a weave but maybe a real lady, and seeing how it seems by reading this thread you might score a date!
    "We've become a nation of strangers. There seems to be very little in common to bond us to our fellow Americans outside of our immediate families,some don't even have that to fall back on."

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    I really couldn't care less, to be honest. I don't expect it from any "men" today, so there's no point dwelling on the matter.
    People turn to poison as quick as lager turns to piss

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    Yes, but, then, so am I.

    With me, it is a conditioned reflex. When I see a person older than I [They're getting hard to find, these days.] or a woman standing on a streetcar, 'bus, or subway train where I am sitting, I become a well-trained Pavlovian dog and rise. Believe it or not, [I don't care.] my gallant action has been greeted with obvious signs of annoyance or resentment from some women.

    I automatically hold the door open for whoever is behind me, even if it's a muscular young man, who, BTW, I find is just as likely to thank me as a woman of any age. I use a cane and I have found that younger men are more likely to offer me their seat on a 'bus or subway train than are women.
    I always thank anyone who renders me a courtesy. It's another Pavlovian conditioned reflex.

    Chivalry is part of good manners, widely regarded as an absurd anachronism in today's world. Courtesy, even when it was, as often, insincere, served to oil the wheels of personal relationships. IMO, it wouldn't hurt us at all to use more polite language in dealing with each other.

  10. #40
    Member Solwynn_AOR's Avatar
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    For the first time since I moved to Winnipeg three years ago, a man held the door open for me, when I entered a business last week. I almost fainted from shock, because since moving to this city three years ago, I've pretty much become accustomed to having doors slammed in my face, epithets screamed at me when I rightfully cross the street, and people in general (let's not just pick on the men, because we all have an obligation to put our best foot forward during our daily grind) who will watch me struggle with something (or someone, as the case may be) and just stand there like some moron letting it happen.

    I would have kissed that man when I thanked him, were it not for all the grocery bags I was carrying.

    Manners in general seem to be outdated these days, unfortunately.

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