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Thread: Men Want Women to Be More Traditional - and Women 'Are HAPPY to Be the Housewife'

  1. #111
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    Quote Originally Posted by Freja_se View Post
    Generally speaking, many women do have more problems establishing authority in the home than men do, even though many modern men seem to have lost the ability, too.
    Since the woman typically gets to spend more time around the children, I actually find it is yet more important for the woman to be able to establish authority than it is for the man. In reality, all the man is supposed to give at the end of the long workday is either his support for what the woman forbade, or the permission for which the woman told the child to wait until daddy was home. I.e. usually the 'big things'.

    Most of the 'little things' like allowing or forbidding the child to go outside and play football with his friends before having finished their homework and the likes will ultimately have to be decided by the woman alone. The idea of being available to negotiate things happening at home every time of the day sounds very ideal, but at the end of the day your employer isn't going to be watching for long if you excuse yourself a fifth time from the same business meeting.
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  2. #112
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    I could never downplay the importance of the father as an authority figure in the home. In an ideal home environment the father and mother complement each other, and both are immensely important in their own way.

    I don't think anything can ever replace a strong, loving father figure. He protects, is a role model to his sons especially, and brings stability and order as well as love and affection.

    I think most women are naturally softer and gentler so sometimes it can be harder for us to have the necessary authority. I think children sense this instinctively and sometimes take advantage of it.

    It is the same thing later in school. There was always the male teacher who never said or did anything special, but as soon as he went into the class room everyone immediately turned silent and gave him their attention, even the most boisterous boys. It was just a natural, effortless authority. I remember that I always looked forward to those lessons.


    Quote Originally Posted by Sigurd View Post
    Since the woman typically gets to spend more time around the children, I actually find it is yet more important for the woman to be able to establish authority than it is for the man. In reality, all the man is supposed to give at the end of the long workday is either his support for what the woman forbade, or the permission for which the woman told the child to wait until daddy was home. I.e. usually the 'big things'.

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  4. #113
    Senior Member hyidi's Avatar
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    Since the woman typically gets to spend more time around the children, I actually find it is yet more important for the woman to be able to establish authority than it is for the man.
    It's the men that don't want to establish authority to the children, men don't want to been seen as the evil parent or to be hated by their own children (In some cases, mothers /fathers want to be best friends to their children and not their parents) Being hated by your children is a good thing, it shows you are being a good parent etc... keeps the child inline with behavior and crime. Sure at times, I hated my mother for her strong authority over me but I came out a good person and I still love her always.

  5. #114
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    Millennial Men Prefer to Be Family Breadwinners, Have Stay-at-Home Wives

    A New York Times op-ed on millennial men details some surprising statistics regarding the way men ages 18-34 view the role they play, or should play, in family life. Nearly 50 percent of men ages 18-25 believe it better for “everyone involved if the man is the achiever outside the home and the woman takes care of the home and family.” A similar survey of high school seniors in 2014 revealed that 58 percent “agreed that the best family was one where the man was the main income earner and the woman took care of the home.” Why, you may ask? The strongest theory suggests that the generation that grew up with two working parents is well aware of the stresses that dynamic brings upon family life:

    …there is considerable evidence that the decline in support for “nontraditional” domestic arrangements stems from young people witnessing the difficulties experienced by parents in two-earner families. A recent study of 22 European and English-speaking countries found that American parents report the highest levels of unhappiness compared with non-parents, a difference the researchers found is “ entirely explained” by the absence of policies supporting work-family balance.

    The writer at the Times quickly turned the statistics into an argument for increased government involvement in family life in the form of paid leave policies and “affordable, high-quality child care.” To back up this claim, the author cites statistics that show that when a woman has to manage too much of the childcare and household responsibilities, presumably because she lives in a male-breadwinner household, the couple’s sex life suffers.

    In other words, the Times wants to combat a generational craving for traditional home and family values with the lure of better sex and potential for increased financial security. Obviously, they aren’t aware of other recent statistics revealing that millennials are increasingly prioritizing family over career, often to the point of choosing the stay-at-home parent dynamic. They must also be unaware of statistics showing the more educated the woman, the more education and earning power she’s looking for in a man, precisely so she can stay at home with her children while they are young.

    To their credit, the Times clearly illustrates the difference between the two types of family culture we’re being asked to choose from. One is the candy-coated vision of mythical “high-quality child care” and extended maternity leaves being forced on us by politicians and activists who insist that a woman’s greatest accomplishments can only be measured in a man’s playing field. The other is the desire of a growing number of young men and women whose vision of family life exists out of that field’s bounds:

    …millennial men are significantly more likely than Gen X or baby boomer men to say that society has already made all the changes needed to create equality in the workplace.

    Both visions are competing against the Times’ Don Draper-esque vision of reality that has men smoking in board rooms and women chained to kitchens and babies. It is in this way the statistics are most revealing: Millennials think Don Draper is the stuff of television, not real life. Perhaps it’s time the writers at the Times catch up.
    https://pjmedia.com/parenting/2017/0...at-home-wives/

  6. #115
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    What exactly do people mean when they refer to 'traditional' women? Is it merely a woman who isn't engaged in paid labour outside the home, or is it a woman who is not only domestic, but also sacrificial, deferential, compliant and nurturing?
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  7. #116
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    Quote Originally Posted by Alice View Post
    What exactly do people mean when they refer to 'traditional' women? Is it merely a woman who isn't engaged in paid labour outside the home, or is it a woman who is not only domestic, but also sacrificial, deferential, compliant and nurturing?
    In my opinion, a 'traditional woman' can still engage in paid labor, as long as she puts her role as a mother before her career. In practice, that would mean staying at home with her children (albeit not all the time) during their early formative years. At least until they've managed to walk, talk and mostly manage to take care of themselves. That's one of the core aspects of it, the way I see it.

    Being sacrificial, deferential and nurturing plays a large role, but I wouldn't say she necessarily needs to be compliant, but seeking to find compromises and harmony in matters of disagreement, and not trying to rule over her partner and seeking out sources of strife and conflict.

    Also, there's the aspect of fidelity, homogamy and sexual virtue.
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  9. #117
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    Women can still be "traditional" and economically independent. I was, thankfully, when I met my current hubby while still with another man I needed to get away from.

    In these uncertain times, everyone needs to be able to take care of themselves, cause being too dependent on someone else can end-up being a total nightmare.
    Not all in life is at it appears to be.

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  11. #118
    Senior Member Sigurdsson's Avatar
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    I don’t think I’ve met a single woman my age who aspired to be a housewife. Whether or not it makes women more happy, it seems that it’s becoming less and less fashionable to do so.

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  13. #119
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    Well, I'm happy to be a housewife but there's plenty of men out there who don't accept this kinda thing. Many dudes expect their chicks to work and bring 50% of the bread in the house (or even more, if they could). That's a no-no if you wanna have a trad type of thing. Tending to the house chores, hubby, kids and so on is a full-time job, believe it or not. Course you can also be a housewife and be economically independent, if you come from a rich family, get some inheritance or do some part-time jobs on the side.

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