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Hellenic Eagle
Sunday, December 14th, 2003, 04:24 PM
What is the norm in your countries of origin?

Stríbog
Sunday, December 14th, 2003, 06:07 PM
What is the norm in your countries of origin?

Oh are we voting for what WE think is the proper age, or for what the NORM is?
In America the educated get married much too late, often after 30 or even 35. I believe 23-25 is the optimal time to get married and start having kids.

Milesian
Thursday, December 18th, 2003, 04:23 PM
Oh are we voting for what WE think is the proper age, or for what the NORM is?
In America the educated get married much too late, often after 30 or even 35. I believe 23-25 is the optimal time to get married and start having kids.

Yeah, I think maybe 25 for a man and 23 for a woman is in terms of virility.
But in reality, I think it takes people longer to get some money in the bank and get to a decent stage in their career. So I chose 25-30 (probably late 20's is best of all)

Glenlivet
Thursday, December 18th, 2003, 06:03 PM
I voted 25-30 (the man being around 5 years older), preferably after the couple have finished their respective university program/course(s). The man can be up to 35, while the woman between 25 and 30.

From the UN Population Division: World Marriage Patterns 2000 Wallchart (http://www.un.org/esa/population/publications/worldmarriage/worldmarriagepatterns2000.pdf)

UNITED NATIONS ISSUES WALL CHART ON MARRIAGE PATTERNS 2000 (http://www.un.org/esa/population/publications/worldmarriage/worldmarriage2000PressRelease.htm)

Overview of US Marriage Patterns, Families and Living Arrangements (http://www.census.gov/population/www/socdemo/hh-fam.html)

Ominous Lord Spoonblade
Thursday, December 18th, 2003, 09:12 PM
I don't think that there is a proper age to get married. It depends on the kind of life someone likes to lead. If a woman wants to be a homemaker, have a large family, and not have a job outside of that, it would be best to marry relatively young. If she only wants two children and a career, well she could get married in her late twenties or early thirties. If someone doesn't want children at all, then it depends solely on when they find someone they want to marry.

I don't think, in general, that it matters at all for a man. He could already have a career and be "ready" to get married at 20, or not until he's 40 -but it also depends on how big a family he wants (men start to get "less-fertile" too) ;-)

I think people should at least be 18 when they are married for the first time. Unless it is an arranged marriage to the Princess/Prince of Agraba or something LOL

After the first marriage (assuming that it ends), it doesn't really matter, does it? It can't. Well, we all know everyone gets divorced these days anyway! :-P

Abby Normal
Saturday, December 20th, 2003, 12:29 AM
Why does everyone think the man should be older (even like 5 years older, like someone else said)? This makes absolutely no sense, as women usually live longer anyway. And personally, I'm just not attracted to older guys at all, and I probably never will be. Seems like a bad bargain to me!

Bärin
Saturday, March 7th, 2009, 07:06 PM
Women, at any age they find a man competent enough to support them. Men, at any age they can afford to support a family by themselves. Ideally, as young as possible (for women) so that they can have their children at the peak of their fertility, and as many as the can afford to. For example, marry with 18, adjust the first year if needed and then have your first child with 19-20. Don't wait too long, the longer you wait, the less ready you will feel. Men can wait a bit longer to marry since their biology is different. Best combination I think is younger woman, older man. If the woman is 18 when she marries, the man should ideally be 23+, have finished studies and have a stable job so that she can afford motherhood and staying home with the children.

Waldstein
Tuesday, August 4th, 2009, 03:03 AM
Please keep in mind that most men in "Western" countries procreate before the age of 35. This is - from a purely evolutionary point of view - not optimal, because the older a man gets, the more mutations his sperm has undergone, and if no men after 35 would continue to have children, no mutations - probably useful mutations from an evolutionary point of view -would be passed down to the next generation. Progress as far as genes are concerned - and there is no cultural progress without biological basis IMO - depends on the procreation of the older men, so to speak.

This is not my opinion but the opinion of a renowned English geneticist in favour of racial intermixture. It just has to be kept in mind in my view. As necessary a certain segregation of well grown racial stock is in my opinion, as important is progress caused by the famous processes Darwin described of (first) mutation and (then) selection on such sound basis.

However, there are certain risks to late procreation: The older a man gets, the higher the risk for him to father autistic sons. But even in this case, nature often has its benefit rising from the ashes of personal misery of the family affected: Imagine a world without a mild form of autism, the Asperger Syndrome: There would be less famous astronomers and physicists, there would be no Wittgenstein!

Gefjon
Tuesday, August 21st, 2018, 04:22 PM
A new study suggests that people should get married between the ages of 28 and 32 if they don’t want to get divorced, at least in the first five years.

Before we proceed to the explanation: Don’t shoot me if you’re older than that and not married yet. These are just statistics and can in no way account for your personal situation, or that last cheater/psycho/narcissist you wasted 18 months on. Nobody’s blaming you. You are a wonderful and entirely loveable person.

Now, moving on.

The study was done by Nick Wolfinger, a sociologist at the University of Utah, and published by the generally pro-marriage Institute of Family Studies. It suggests that people who get married between 28 and 32 split up least in the ensuing years. This is a new development; sociologists formerly believed that waiting longer to get hitched usually led to more stability, and there was no real sell-by date.

Wolfinger analyzed data from 2006-2010 and the 2011-2013 National Survey of Family Growth. He found a sort of upside down bell curve. “The odds of divorce decline as you age from your teenage years through your late twenties and early thirties,” he writes. “Thereafter, the chances of divorce go up again as you move into your late thirties and early forties.” For each year after about 32, the chance of divorce goes up about 5% says the study.

Some wag over at Slate called this the Goldilocks theory of getting married: you have to be not too young and not too old.

There are lots of reasons why late 20s/early 30s would make sense as a time to start a lifelong partnership with someone: people are old enough to understand if they really get along with someone or are just blinded by hormones. They’ve already made significant life choices and taken on some responsibilities. And they may be just financially solvent enough to be able to contemplate supporting someone should the need arise.

On the other hand, they’re not so old and set in their ways that they can’t make the myriad of little adjustments in habits and lifestyle and goals and personal hygiene that marriage requires. They probably don’t have ex-spouses or children among whom they to divide their time, resources and loyalty.

Wolfinger says the curve persists “even after controlling for respondents’ sex, race, family structure of origin, age at the time of the survey, education, religious tradition, religious attendance, and sexual history, as well as the size of the metropolitan area that they live in.” He thinks the reason might be selection bias. “The kinds of people who wait till their thirties to get married may be the kinds of people who aren’t predisposed toward doing well in their marriages,” he writes. This also means “people who marry later face a pool of potential spouses that has been winnowed down to exclude the individuals most predisposed to succeed at matrimony.”

(Again, I refer you to my caveat in paragraph two. It’s Mr. Wolfinger suggesting singles over 32 are not marriage material, not me. )

Other sociologists who cover this waterfront were quick to weigh in with doubts. The University of Maryland’s Phillip Cohen used a different set of data, from the American Community Survey, to say that getting older didn’t mean your marriage had less chance of survival. According to his analysis, the perfect age to get married if you don’t want to get divorced is 45 to 49, which, he notes, is why people shouldn’t make life decisions based on statistical analyses on the Internet.

The truth is: divorce is a difficult social pattern to measure. Many states decline to collect data on it. And since a growing number of people are opting for living together without getting the government seal of approval, counting divorce is becoming less useful as a way of measuring family fracturing.

Still, there are a few truisms backed by research: Having money and a college degree reduces your chances of getting divorced, as does getting engaged before moving in together and waiting to have kids until after the nuptials. Those you can pretty much take to the bank.http://time.com/3966588/marriage-wedding-best-age/

Wuotans Krieger
Thursday, November 29th, 2018, 01:43 PM
There is not an option in this poll for the answer 'never'. How strange!

Finnish Swede
Thursday, November 29th, 2018, 02:04 PM
25-30 seems to have most of votes. No worries yet :D.

Gareth Lee Hunter
Thursday, November 29th, 2018, 02:35 PM
More importantly than age grouping, successful marriages depend on other criteria, such as the level of maturity of a prospective husband and wife... And I know men and women in their twenties to late thirties who literally possess the mentalities of the average adolescent, which is truly pathetic.

Wuotans Krieger
Thursday, November 29th, 2018, 04:53 PM
More importantly than age grouping, successful marriages depend on other criteria, such as the level of maturity of a prospective husband and wife... And I know men and women in their twenties to late thirties who literally possess the mentalities of the average adolescent, which is truly pathetic.

A good observation. Maybe we are getting old but I have noticed how people are getting more infantile in their behaviours, regardless of how 'intelligent' they may otherwise be.