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Bridie
Wednesday, April 12th, 2006, 05:06 PM
Do you think that "only children" suffer or are at a disadvantage? If so, how many siblings would you say is ideal? (If there is an ideal in your opinion)

I'm going to say that I LOVE big families and think that kids benefit greatly from having lots of brothers and sisters.... as long as the parents can care for them all well. So maybe my limit on children in a family would be around 12 (depending on finances, mother's ability to cope etc).

Imperator X
Wednesday, April 12th, 2006, 05:44 PM
As an only child I can say this is true to a degree. I think only children are not as well socialized or have less tolerance for being around people for a prolonged amount of time. Both of my ex gf's were also only children, the first was an intelligent Bohemian, quite different from most, and my second, who was more like an affair, was an alcoholic, slutty kook. Intelligent and as interesting as all Hell, but nonetheless a kook. The latter's Indian mother was very protective of her, and she (the ex in question) was secretly seeing a 60 year old Viet Nam veteran. Father complex, anyone?

Only children often have to find things to do apart from other children, hence my interest in mythology, history, paganism, Hinduism etc. I get irritated when I'm around someone for too long, unless they are the most interesting, intelligent, out there person. I usually can't relate too much with the average person, owing to their ignorance of my favorite subjects, and my distaste of pop culture.

Weg
Wednesday, April 12th, 2006, 06:13 PM
I've known a few "only children", they were spoilted, egoists, had bad habbits, manners and education. I think kids need many siblings their age. 12 brothers and sisters may be something wonderful, on the other hand in such big families, the youngest kids, who can have as much as 10 and more years in age difference with the elder, don't know their older brothers/sisters, and vice versa. At least, that's what happens in traditional families over here. It must be very strange to have siblings you actually don't know much. But well, provided you've siblings your age, I vote for big families. :thumbup

ostseefront
Wednesday, April 12th, 2006, 06:22 PM
One should never disadvantage children. Finally they are our future. If one only disadvantages a child, since one cannot custom be made a child. Children need special attention.

Phlegethon
Thursday, April 13th, 2006, 03:16 AM
Only children are pretty much the norm around here - in families which actually have children, that is. Most scientific studies have established that there is no significant behavioral differences between only children and children with siblings. I do not consider being an only child a gruesome fate per se. The gruesome fate is having been born at all.

Dr. Solar Wolff
Thursday, April 13th, 2006, 06:15 AM
There are all sorts of pros and cons to being an only child. In the end, it is that individual child who makes his or her world what it is as it is with every individual.

Bridie
Thursday, April 13th, 2006, 02:18 PM
Thanks everyone for your opinions. :)



I've known a few "only children", they were spoilted, egoists, had bad habbits, manners and education.Crikey! :-O That's a bit harsh Weggsie! :P


12 brothers and sisters may be something wonderful, on the other hand in such big families, the youngest kids, who can have as much as 10 and more years in age difference with the elder, don't know their older brothers/sisters, and vice versa. But why would they need to be close in age to all of their siblings? They'd still have a few that would be close in age. I think its a positive thing for kids to know and be able to get along with people of all different age groups. Its particularly good for the older girls to get used to caring for babies and young children, so when they come to having their own it won't be such a big shock, and they'll already know what's what. :)




Children need special attention.I think that too much attention can be a bad thing.... its not healthy for kids to live under a virtual micro-scope, having all of their actions/words scrutinised because their parents have too much time and energy to focus on one child iykwim? That's too much pressure. :( Kids need to know to that they're not the centre of the universe. ;)



Only children are pretty much the norm around here - in families which actually have children, that is. Seriously?? Its the most common number of kids to have in a family? I wonder if Germany is having, (or is going to have soon,) the same sorts of problems as China now with their one child policy in terms of producing "little emporers"?....

http://jcgi.pathfinder.com/fortune/articles/0,15114,698524,00.html



I do not consider being an only child a gruesome fate per se. I wouldn't have thought it was a gruesome fate! :-O :D


The gruesome fate is having been born at all.You're just making this too easy for me.... :D :D .... I won't bite. :P

Phlegethon
Thursday, April 13th, 2006, 02:37 PM
You'll get there when the drugs cease to sedate and you suddenly get an OD of reality.

Bridie
Thursday, April 13th, 2006, 02:47 PM
You'll get there when the drugs cease to sedate and you suddenly get an OD of reality.

I'm not sedated.... I'm just behaving myself. ;) :D Reality??? You go moping around feeling sorry for yourself all day every day... and you say that I'm out of touch with reality??!! Get a dose of my reality love, then you'll have something to be depressed about. :|

Weg
Thursday, April 13th, 2006, 03:04 PM
Crikey! :-O That's a bit harsh Weggsie! :P

There may be exceptions to the rule, still. ;)


But why would they need to be close in age to all of their siblings?

I meant close to "many" (from an European point of view) of their siblings, that is 2 or 3, to play with and for some other obvious reasons. No need to make children if they are like strangers and in very big families, it happens frequently. When the elder leave the house, the youngest is still eating its mother's breast, so it doesn't help to build good sibling relations.


They'd still have a few that would be close in age.

Also, it sometimes happens parents make a break and the new born has no sibling its age, it's no good. It's also a question of "management", in some way.


I think its a positive thing for kids to know and be able to get along with people of all different age groups. Its particularly good for the older girls to get used to caring for babies and young children, so when they come to having their own it won't be such a big shock, and they'll already know what's what. :)

Agreed. I had this in mind, especially the later. :)


I think that too much attention can be a bad thing....


Kids need to know to that they're not the centre of the universe. ;)

Hence my comments on only children.

Phlegethon
Thursday, April 13th, 2006, 03:13 PM
You go moping around feeling sorry for yourself all day every day...

I don't feel sorry for myself. I know what is going on. I feel sorry for those who don't and are in for a big, nasty surprise.


and you say that I'm out of touch with reality??!!

Yep. That can happen when the sun fries the remainder of what is left of colonist brains.

Bridie
Thursday, April 13th, 2006, 03:21 PM
.... oh crap.... I can feel the drugs wearing off.... might be time to get out the magnifying glass soon....

:-O


But before I do....

I know what is going on.So what's going on??

Alice
Saturday, June 15th, 2019, 03:30 PM
I'm not sure whether only children suffer or at a disadvantage, and I don't believe they are the overinduged and spoiled brats people presume them to be. I have read studies that show a positive correlation between children's social competence and the number of siblings, though. Positive sibling relationships can also affect child's cognitive and emotional development for the better. Ideal number of siblings? I have no clue, really, and I suppose it would depend on the individual family and their personal circumstances.

Sigurdsson
Sunday, June 16th, 2019, 02:40 AM
No

Schmetterling
Sunday, June 16th, 2019, 01:02 PM
I'm not sure but personally, I would prefer that my child have at least one other sibling to play, interact and socialize with. I've found some who were only children to be introverted, or even bratty and entitled, it's not a rule though. Of course being an only child does not mean one cannot have friends and socialize normally, but there is still a distinctive difference between best friends and siblings/family. In the end, it can go either way, depending on the circumstances involved. Some parents tend to spoil their children, and having an only child could lead to the child becoming overprotected and sheltered, or having their every wish indulged. This can become counterproductive when the child leaves the nest and realizes that out there in the world they aren't as special as they were to their parents...