How Can One Be Surrounded By People Yet Lonely?

[Northern Paladin]

How Can One Be Surrounded By People Yet Lonely?

This is often the case with me. I can't relate to my parents, I can't relate to my peers, it seems that everyone in this world is out for #1, and well that leaves one feeling cold on the inside.

How do you guys feel about this issue?

It seems like my whole life has passed, but I haven't made any deep personal attachments except for a guy I knew in High School, I consider him the closest thing to a friend I have in this world.

It seems like everyone is so practical in this World, they are out for number 1. If you can help them they will sell their very soul to you if you can't your just a useless loser, and often I've seen friendships fall apart because "a friend" was simply using someone and moved on to "better things" and hence abandons his former friend.

I think this is Especially true about Girls. It seems like women are all about "Using" and "Tossing" away when something "Better" or more "Interesting" comes along. I say this because its happened to me quite recently, I feel bad, but what can one do, unless one has the Power to change things?

[DanseMacabre]

I think modern society alienates individuals. Perhaps I'm too misanthropic but I view most people as base,degenerate,materialistic,egotistic, amoral swine. So I believe one can feel lonely when surrounded by the dimwitted lemmings of the world.

[Leof]

Your threads tell me you are having a rough time Drift. In answer to your question, I think that's the fruits of globalism and the multi-cult. With all this freedom and indivuation we lose the glue that makes us capable of relating to our piers and thus is the fate of all great empires. It is human nature to want to be a part of the group and to have a collective we identify with. Part of the reason why we here at the Althing champion for the common goal of preserving our own culture.

[Northern Paladin]

I think modern society alienates individuals. Perhaps I'm too misanthropic but I view most people as base,degenerate,materialistic,egotistic, amoral swine. So I believe one can feel lonely when surrounded by the dimwitted lemmings of the world.

Yep, and that's not to say I'm not capable of being all those things, but I also like to think I have a Noble side. What's more a lot of young people these days seem to be worshipping bands. Bands like Cobra Starship which are piss stupid.

What's more the average person is a mindless follower. When I asked my gf why she was so into Cobra Starship she basically told me because that's what her friends were into. So your right most people are Lemmings who need something like a band to find their own identity because they are so aimless and looking for something to follow.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oNF08htoH00

I hate Cobra Starship because its the most mindless Hedonistic nonsense out there. And suprise suprise the band members are Jews and so are the producers. Someone please tell me this is total crap! Yet this is what a lot of young people are into these days!

[Northern Paladin]

Your threads tell me you are having a rough time Drift. In answer to your question, I think that's the fruits of globalism and the multi-cult. With all this freedom and indivuation we lose the glue that makes us capable of relating to our piers and thus is the fate of all great empires. It is human nature to want to be a part of the group and to have a collective we identify with. Part of the reason why we here at the Althing champion for the common goal of preserving our own culture.

This is a pretty cool place. Because a lot of people here are free thinkers. In the real World most people are Mindless Followers. They do something not because of inner conviction but because they see everyone else doing it.

The Mindless Hedonistic Youth Culture combined with the unceasing cult of Diversity is why I hate this Country so much!

Your right the fabric of American society is tearing apart, but its only because we let it happen. The way I see it America is irredeemly wicked.

[Hrafn]

How Can One Be Surrounded By People Yet Lonely?

This is often the case with me. I can't relate to my parents, I can't relate to my peers, it seems that everyone in this world is out for #1, and well that leaves one feeling cold on the inside.

How do you guys feel about this issue?

It seems like my whole life has passed, but I haven't made any deep personal attachments except for a guy I knew in High School, I consider him the closest thing to a friend I have in this world.

It seems like everyone is so practical in this World, they are out for number 1. If you can help them they will sell their very soul to you if you can't your just a useless loser, and often I've seen friendships fall apart because "a friend" was simply using someone and moved on to "better things" and hence abandons his former friend.

I think this is Especially true about Girls. It seems like women are all about "Using" and "Tossing" away when something "Better" or more "Interesting" comes along. I say this because its happened to me quite recently, I feel bad, but what can one do, unless one has the Power to change things?

A fact that is commonly ignored in modern egalitarian society is that people are never "equal" in any way, especially not in spirit. I have learned that one can only have an intimate relationship/friendship with a person who is spiritually more or less his equal (as close as possible; as I said, complete equality is never possible).

The fact that spirit is these days disregarded in favor of material possession and social reputation makes it increasingly difficult for a person to find a stimulating friendship or fulfilling relationship. It is pretty much pure coincidence to find such a person. Imagine the likelihood of two points in a five dimentional system having the same coordinates (three dimensions of space, one of time, one of spirit). Of course this is a simpification, but you can see what I mean.

[theTasmanian]

How Can One Be Surrounded By People Yet Lonely?

This is often the case with me. I can't relate to my parents, I can't relate to my peers, it seems that everyone in this world is out for #1, and well that leaves one feeling cold on the inside.

How do you guys feel about this issue?

If left to my own devices i dont like people.......i can sit in a crowded place and not "feel" any of them and i would not want to be there
BUT i do get along with people of "like" interests and at work(mostly)



It seems like my whole life has passed, but I haven't made any deep personal attachments except for a guy I knew in High School, I consider him the closest thing to a friend I have in this world.

I have only two people i can REALLY call friend(i often all they best friends) one is from collage the other we met through car interests......i know they have the same way of making friends


It seems like everyone is so practical in this World, they are out for number 1. If you can help them they will sell their very soul to you if you can't your just a useless loser, and often I've seen friendships fall apart because "a friend" was simply using someone and moved on to "better things" and hence abandons his former friend.
AH yes i use to have lots of "so called friends" when i was in my early twenty's most went there separate ways and are a bunch of back stabbers not worth knowing;)



I think this is Especially true about Girls. It seems like women are all about "Using" and "Tossing" away when something "Better" or more "Interesting" comes along. I say this because its happened to me quite recently, I feel bad, but what can one do, unless one has the Power to change things?
my first nine or ten "girl friends" all used and cheated on me.....persevere!!!:thumbup

it can take time to find a Female companion that is really worth it........and it really will be;)

[Rainraven]

I can see where you are coming from with this thread. For a lot of people they set out in life to achieve their goals. And often they don't care who they trample on in their quest to get there. People like the idea of being able to lie on their death bed and think they have accomplished something in their life. Unfortunately making long, lasting relationships no longer seems to be viewed as an accomplishment.

My best advice to you would be to find people like you. If you find people that share similar interests and morals to you it is less likely that they will turn arouond and stab you in the back. Good luck :)

[Oresai]

I quite like people, but I couldn`t eat a whole one. :D

There seems to be a fair amount of people here who are happily anti social in one way or another, happy with their own company and disenchanted with others in general, and I can see why.
The world at large seems to be a shallow, hostile place with little succour to offer the traveller through it unless you enter into the spirit of mainstream society and play the same games as everyone else.
Thank the gods for individuals, eh?;) :)
I agree with Rainraven, values seem to have changed, and where in the past kinship, close alliances and ties and certain priniciples and ethics held sway, now people generally seem rootless and adrift. I wonder how much is to do with the feeling that nothing is reliable in the world anymore, from the word of a person to governmental promises of a better more secure future...oh wait...that`s always been the case....;)...to the seemingly transient nature of intimate relationships.
Like many others, I`m a bit of a loner, but happy to be so. From childhood I was the solitary bairn off somewhere quiet with a book or alone, often daydreaming.
I won`t even say it`s through being hurt and let down that I developed into a solitary adult...I just don`t care much for being sociable, and haven`t the social skills to successfully do so...too blunt by far! :D
In fact I am comfiest on my own, or with a tiny group of people I know well around me...some of the most miserable times I had were in trying to `fit in` to mainstream life, and being painfully aware that, I didnt....
and those were the times I was lonely in the crowd.

[QuietWind]

One of the best ways to fight loneliness is to learn to be comfortable with yourself. We are conditioned to believe that we need someone else to complete us. Instead we need to learn how to become whole, complete individuals on our own. We need to learn how to enjoy our own company.

[Blood_Axis]

Easily, if one is surrounded by idiots.

Probably true for a lot of us Skadites that still have some sense(/itivity) left in them, since a great majority out there is shallow, brainwashed masses. :shrug

[Gorm the Old]

If one knows none of the people and has nothing in common with them, it is very easy to be achingly lonely. A few years ago, I went to Hawaii alone and attended a luau on Oahu. There were about 800 people in attendance at that luau, of whom I knew NOBODY.

I have never felt so lonely before in my life. :~( I find solitude far easier to accept than being a misfit in a huge crowd of strangers. Everyone else there seemed to know SOMEBODY, even if only one person. A luau is supposed to be a convivial gathering, but I had no one with whom to be "vivial".

The food was good and the entertainment was excellent, but I felt out of place amongst the merrymakers. So, yes, I was VERY lonely while surrounded by people. :(

[Blusnayl]

Aye, it's very difficult to avoid loneliness when so many people share so few similarities in beliefs/morals/values with you. Especially so for a lot of us folks here on the forum who's beliefs run at stark contrast with the mainstream. The prospect of being surrounded by people you simply just aren't like and can't bond with is as others have said probably emotionally more lonely a prospect than actually being physically alone.

The key is to find people who you feel you can truly bond with. Fortunately we have the internet so we can find others like ourselves scattered about the world to talk to. However, that will never replace having close friends/partner in real life physically by your side.

Most importantly, just don't give up the fight, it may be hard to find someone, but they do exist.

[Lostsoulwanders]

You're not alone in it all, though it may feel like it. I feel this way the greater majority of the time. My mother always blamed it on my solitary nature as a kid but it's hard to be friendly when the world is cold...

[rainman]

I feel the same way. I have nothing to connect to. If you want you can work with me to create a group. Just contact me and move out to where I'm at. I've been wanting to build a society for years. At any rate there is nothing wrong with conforming to a group and being part of it. the problem is you need to find a group of similar people.

Individualism is rampant among leaders and those who do not conform or go against the grain of society, but it is not always healthy. We are not islands, we are instead drops of water in an ocean. We need to have bonds between ourselves and our friends such as shared music, attitudes, appearance etc. This is also why you become the company you keep. A group can lower you or raise you up- level you out more towards their level. Above average people are typically pulled down by the crowd and below average people propped up by it. Therefore below average people feel more strength in a group and more dependency on herd like conformity. If you were around people vastly smarter and superior to you then you would probably be the same way.

[Jarlsson]

Going to school having this feeling most of the time is quite frustrating.
As mentioned, one has to learn to enjoy the company of yourself. This may not be easy when placed in such a situation in the first place.
What keeps me going through the days, is the survival for people with healthy mind and soul. I will not blend into the common social circles. If one tries to do this it will only break you will utterly more and putting it to the ultimate test.

I have left/lost my bestfriends already. We now have a totally different view at life and morals. Growing up with the current youth watching this sick degeneration is depressing. The social contact at school is false. When I speak to old friends the whole conversation is false... I have sometimes asked them about their view on life, and generally for the whole school it goes something like; drinking, drugs, thinking of girls like some sick toys etc etc the common.

But scaringly this trend seems to develop/worsen and follow people into adulthood.

The result of this is me being an asocial. My mother keeps complaining about this and want me to atleast try socialise once a week with these morons (for the sake of socializing itself). But I cannot keep "tricking" my mind and play along in their rubbish conversations.

So next time you face a feeling like it, think of your minds value and its purity compared to the herd:)

"Better off alone than in bad company".

-Jarlsson

[Huginn ok Muninn]

Individualism is rampant among leaders and those who do not conform or go against the grain of society, but it is not always healthy. We are not islands, we are instead drops of water in an ocean.

The more disparate a group, the more the leadership can sort of follow its own path and ignore the needs of the people.

We are not made to be isolated entities, but part of a tribe. Indeed our identities can be seen as partially oneself, and partially as a member of a group. The group I feel kinship to are Germanics, and it has always been that way. We are greatly crippled by being apart from one another, and strengthened together. The reason you find many people in America and South Africa are what our enemies would term as "racists" is simply that we know what it's like to have so few of our own around us, and so many aliens in the way. You can't say that in many parts of Europe, but you are beginning to understand if you live in bigger cities. We are a tribal people. We take strength from one another, and our enemies realize this. It's time we educated the unawakened among ourselves as well.

[Grimsteinr]

I guess I see things differently, than most of you. I can walk into a room full of people and within a couple minutes, I can have a conversation going with a couple of them. I find all sorts of commonalities with people. Some of these commonalities are on a superficial level of course. These generally open the door to deeper conversations and thought.
Perhaps it's because I'm older.But, I have pretty much always been this way. I am one of the"talkers", who always find a way to "break the ice" in a crowd.

It's a good quality to have, I think. It opens doors to friendships and aquaintances that might in the future have value, to myself.
Without that "talent" that I have cultivated, I would not have met many good people, who have enriched my life.

Granted, it has on occasion caused me to be thrust into a position of leadership or spokes-person. But, I never shy away from the work, required. It's part of "giving back to my Community and my Folk".
I think that's a Duty we all have, on different levels.

[SpearBrave]

I like people so I usually never feel alone among large groups of like minded people. However when I have been around large groups of Hippies( leftist ), Negroes, Hispanics, Obama supporters, etc. I feel very much alone.

[Nordlander]

A Warrior is never alone as long as he has his weapons. Most people are of the "flock" or "herd" mentality and are of no consequence anyway. If you are not with a person who is like minded in your beliefs or someone you can gain knowledge from why bother as it is a waste of time.If you are bored ,train with your weapons ,when you grow tired ,read information to gain knowledge and wisdom. I would train my troops to do this in the Marine Corps and it not only kept their minds off of home but made them better Warriors. Pidgeons ,sheep and flies form large groups, Eagles ,Grizzly bears and Tigers are solitary animals.Which would you rather be like?

[SpearBrave]

A Warrior is never alone as long as he has his weapons. Most people are of the "flock" or "herd" mentality and are of no consequence anyway. If you are not with a person who is like minded in your beliefs or someone you can gain knowledge from why bother as it is a waste of time.If you are bored ,train with your weapons ,when you grow tired ,read information to gain knowledge and wisdom. I would train my troops to do this in the Marine Corps and it not only kept their minds off of home but made them better Warriors. Pidgeons ,sheep and flies form large groups, Eagles ,Grizzly bears and Tigers are solitary animals.Which would you rather be like?

I agree with not being around people that are not like minded but sometimes in today's world it cannot be always avoided.:( That is enough reason to cause feelings of being alone.


The animals you mentioned do form groups:
Bears in groups are called a - sloth/sleuth
Eagles in a groups- convocation
Tigers in a groups- streak

Most animals form groups from time to time as do humans they just are stick to their groups as nature intended. So we should stick to our groups( race ) as nature intended.;)

[Nordlander]

I agree with not being around people that are not like minded but sometimes in today's world it cannot be always avoided.:( That is enough reason to cause feelings of being alone.


The animals you mentioned do form groups:
Bears in groups are called a - sloth/sleuth
Eagles in a groups- convocation
Tigers in a groups- streak

Most animals form groups from time to time as do humans they just are stick to their groups as nature intended. So we should stick to our groups( race ) as nature intended.;)

Thanks! point taken ;I should have said small groups. I was just trying to emphasize natures way of selecting superior animals (the solitary few) compared to the herd animals (the many) and comparing it to our own peoples struggles (the superior few) against the dross of society (the many) And yes,unfortunately we must deal with the dross on this earth and that can be taxing.

[Schlosser]

It seems I have always been alone, though i'm constantly surrounded by people. There is not a single person i've met that I can truly relate to. Finding people with similar interests is not even an option in my area. Internet is insubstantial.

Its a lonely path to be different, but its what i've chosen. My family doesn't understand and thus pushes me to "socialize" and "make friends" at school, but all in vain... The "friends" I once had, I purified myself of many years past, now sub-humans, degenerating themselves to the masses.

But I prefer it this way, **Better alone than in bad company!

[Nordlander]

It seems I have always been alone, though i'm constantly surrounded by people. There is not a single person i've met that I can truly relate to. Finding people with similar interests is not even an option in my area. Internet is insubstantial.

Its a lonely path to be different, but its what i've chosen. My family doesn't understand and thus pushes me to "socialize" and "make friends" at school, but all in vain... The "friends" I once had, I purified myself of many years past, now sub-humans, degenerating themselves to the masses.

But I prefer it this way, **Better alone than in bad company!

"That what does not kill me ,only makes me stronger" Friedrich Nietzsche

[frippardthree]

I agree with not being around people that are not like minded but sometimes in today's world it cannot be always avoided. That is enough reason to cause feelings of being alone.

That's generally how it is at work for a lot of people. Fortunately, people work to earn a living, not to make friends. In todays' society we are kind of forced to work with people, that have an extreme diversity of opinions. I have just learned to adapt to it, but that does not necessarily mean agreeing with everyone you encounter or becoming friends with them.

Loneliness
The most broadly accepted definition of loneliness is the distress that results from discrepancies between ideal and perceived social relationships. This so-called cognitive discrepancy perspective makes it clear that loneliness is not synonymous with being alone, nor does being with others guarantee protection from feelings of loneliness. Rather, loneliness is the distressing feeling that occurs when one’s social relationships are perceived as being less satisfying than what is desired. This entry describes how loneliness is conceived and measured; how loneliness is mentally represented; how loneliness influences thoughts, feelings, and behaviors; and consequences of loneliness for health and wellbeing.
Conceptualizations
Despite general agreement over its definition, loneliness is conceived in a number of ways. One theory of loneliness holds that deficiencies in specific provisions of social relationships contribute to specific types of lonely feelings. For instance, lack of engagement in a social network is associated with feelings of social loneliness such as aimlessness, boredom, and exclusion. On the other hand, absence of a reliable attachment figure (e.g., spouse) is associated with feelings of emotional loneliness such as anxiety, desolation, and insecurity. More recent studies have shown that these types of lonely feelings are not uniquely associated with certain
relationships, however.


Full Article:
http://psychology.uchicago.edu/people/faculty/cacioppo/jtcreprints/hc09.pdf